Charmed*1

Moving out!!

2006-08-04T02:55:00.000-05:00

Okay so I'm tired of messing with Blogger and pictures not loading and many other things. So I jumped on the band wagon and moved over to Word Press. It's not to hard, just need to figure some things out.

I played SPF so come visit!!

Charmed1

Thursday Thirteen #1

2006-08-03T16:48:00.000-05:00

Thirteen random things about me...

13. I like newborn babies, a lot, but once they turn 2 they need to go.

12. I am messy as hell, and I call it "organized chaos".

11. I'm either to lazy to to stupid to figure out Word Press.

10. I take my big green camera bag everywhere I go.

9. I've dyed my hair for so long, I can't remember the true color.

8. I still need to shower today.

7. I think my neighbor is a bitch.

6. I feel sorry for the above mentioned person's husband (she must carry his stuff in her purse).

5. I haven't had sex in almost 3 weeks, only because of the hysterectomy.

4. I have several "best friends", but keep many secrets from them.

3. I've actually had 5 babies, full term.

2. Only one of my 5 is a true angel.

1. I sorely need to catch up on my scrapbooking.

Hump Day Hunt - Week #1

2006-08-02T16:03:00.000-05:00

Our word for this week is:

Open

Lake Michigan

I chose this picture because even though it's a lake, you can look forever and not see land.

Talk about something being open...

TMI Tuesday #42

2006-08-01T00:18:00.000-05:00

1. Is there any type of sexual act you're embarrassed to ask for? (If so, what? Hee...)

Not really sure, never had to ask for anything.

2. Have you ever dumped someone purely because of bad sexual performance?

No, so far so good!
3. Name something you would say no to if asked to do in bed.

Anal... Sorry hon, I love you and all, but I draw the line here.

4. The three words that best describe you in bed are ____, ____, and ____.

Loud, loud and loud.

5. Have you ever been so emotionally moved by a sexual experience (in a good way), that you cried?

Several times!

Bonus (as in optional): What could your partner bring to bed that would most turn you on?

That's easy! Himself! He usually falls asleep on the couch and once he's asleep, there's no getting him up... I mean awake.

Got Gas?

2006-07-31T21:56:00.000-05:00

From the fabulous Fleur de Lisa at http://manicmondaymeme.blogspot.com/

1. Do you find yourself driving less due to the high gas prices?

No not really, but I really don't drive a lot unless the kids have something they need to do.

2. This week, Exxon Mobil reported quarterly profits of more than $10.3 billion, the second-best quarter ever for a U.S. company. As we're paying, on average, $3.00 per gallon here in the U.S., do you think the oil companies are using the conflict in the Mid-East as an excuse to gouge consumers?

Heck yeah! Especially after hearing they (the oil companies) are reporting a 65% higher than last year increase.

3. According to the Department of Energy, adjusted for inflation, the price of gasoline is still below its all time peak back in 1981. Back in 1981 the average new car got 21 miles per gallon. Today the average new car gets 22 miles per gallon. Why do you think there hasn't been more innovation and progress in this area?

It's a government conspiracy! They raise gas prices, we buy vehicles that use less gas, they raise prices again, and we're stuck with 5 years worth of payments that we can barely afford and higher gas prices.

TAG! I'm it!

2006-07-31T20:54:00.000-05:00

I've been tagged by Irish Church Lady to:
1. Do the following WITHOUT complaint.
2. Choose five people to do this after you've completed yours.
3. Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say he/she has been tagged.
4. Start your post with I have been tagged! Then do this. (copy and paste!)
I was just out surfing and thought I'd check out my own blog and noticed I had a new comment and BAM! I was tagged. So here goes...
favorites:
favorite cooler: Blue. Any shade is good!
favorite Food: Steak!!
favorite Movie: Long Kiss Goodnight
favorite Sport: basketball, but only when University of Kentucky is playing.
favorite Day of the Week: Friday
favorite Season: Fall. I love the beautiful colors that come along with it.
favorite Ice Cream: Schwanns chocolate. I'm not a big ice cream eater.
Currents:
Current Mood: pretty good
Current Clothes: scrubs and a tshirt
Current Desktop: Fall pictures of my kids. It's somewhere on this blog.
Current Time: 12:02 AM
Current Surroundings: My bed, dressers, computer printers...
Current Annoyances: Actually for once in my life I'm not annoyed at something.
First:
First Best Friend: Shelly. She was a little girl whose parents had a houseboat a couple of docks down from ours when I was little.
Last:
Last Drink: Iced Green tea
Last Car Ride: Nephews' birthday party
Last Crush: My hubby says it's the pediatrician
Last Phone Call: My Aunt
Last CD played: Some rap cd, but only because it's hooked up to the alarm and it wakes us all up.
Have you ever:
Have you ever dated one of your best friends: yes
Have you ever broken the law: yes
Have you ever been arrested: no
Have you ever been on TV: yes
Have you ever kissed someone you don't know: no
Things:
5 things you are good at: Singing, scrapbooking, editing, I like to think I'm pretty good with my camera, drinking with the guys...
4 things you have done today: fed the kids, folded clothes, chased the kids and dog with the water hose, watered my poor poor dead flowers
3 things you can hear right now: humidifier, hubby snoring, TV

I've tagged Bossy Britches, Kristine, Kami... Okay I know I was supposed to have 5, but I really don't post much to other peoples blogs, so I don't have a lot of links to list.

SPF Friday

2006-07-27T23:41:00.000-05:00

I can't find the original post on Kristine's blog with the title to this weeks SPF, but I do have the rest of it. So hear goes nothing....

Something Mean Looking

Ewwwwwwww!! Scary!! He's so vicious looking in this picture! I mean look at him in all of his fat glory and his big yellow glowing eyes!! He's taking over the vacuum cleaner... If he's managed to take over that, I wonder what's next...

My Weapons

Okay, other than words or my sweet little home demolishing team, I really don't have any weapons. So in SOCOM style I am brandishing my M60E3. My clan mates tell me when they see the muzzle flash they know to duck and cover. I may not be the best player and my aim is crappy, but at least I'll take you down enough for the next player to kill you... BOOYAH!

My Hiding Place

At risk of incriminating myself I will not answer this without my lawyer present...

Happy SPF!! Did you play?

Surgery

2006-07-23T12:59:00.000-05:00

Okay I'm going to make this one short and sweet because I'm starting to hurt from sitting here in this computer chair. Over the last 5 years I've had, lets say girly issues. After I had Ian they only got worse. So about 2 months ago, after begging for 3 years, my Dr relented and said we could remove what was causing the issues. So Friday morning I had a partial Hysterectomy. Everything went well, except for the me freaking out in the recovery room thing, and I am home. I am now off to take something for pain and will see you all a little later.

SPF Friday

2006-07-23T11:50:00.000-05:00

Okay so I thought I would get everything up to date and My SPF up before I went to the hospital, but at 4 in the morning it didn't look like it was going to get done. So here I am 2 days late, but better than never.

Taking Names & Making Wishes

Stuff Unnoticed

Something you have that goes unnoticed even though it's there for the world to see

When in a crowd I tend to stand back and try to keep my head low. I have real self esteem issues, which are rearing their ugly heads right now. I guess I figure, if I remain unseen than there's no chance of me making a mistake or saying the wrong thing.

My Wish

I have always wanted a Suburban. I can hear my mom and mother in law now... "You don't want that, it's to big... blah, blah, blah..." It's perfect for me. There's more than enough room for me and the kids, there's enough room for the groceries and so on. So my wish is to eventually own one of these.

Under my Sink

Believe it or not this is one of the more organized places in my house. For whatever reason it's not that bad and I'm not complaining.

O'hana

2006-07-18T11:27:00.000-05:00

O'hana means family.

Family means...

...nobody gets left behind.

Or...?

Or forgotten.

Someone said this to me about a recent issue and I think it really fits. I think that's why the issue bothers me as much as it does. Maybe I have some blown out idea of what a family is, but whatever. I thought family was supposed to stand next to one another no matter what. Okay so I know this isn't always realistic, but when your a family of misplaced individuals, as some of us are, I thought that bond was made stronger. I guess I was wrong. Or at least I feel I am wrong now. I can see one friend reading this and trying to psycho analyze it to tell me what's wrong (stop Alex, you're Ph.D. isn't getting you anywhere), while another says I understand why you're angry and hurt, no you don't. I think now more than ever I'm just nauseated. Literally sick to my stomach. My nerves are shot, my veins are blown and I digress.

Surgery

So I went this morning for my pre-surgery blood work. You always have to love that. The nurse was very gentle and did her best to find a better vein, but was only able to find a tiny one that eventually blew. This led to another poke. Even though she had to poke me again, it still wasn't to bad. Either I'm getting over me poking issues or she was just really good. Kinky, huh? So anyways, the last thing she needed was some pee. Yeah, okay, I'll get right on that. She probably shouldn't have said it out loud, then maybe my bladder wouldn't have known and shut itself off. I mean instant freeze up. Thankfully I'm only about 10 minutes from the hospital so in the morning I'll get up and run off to give her my bladder full of pee, lets just hope I don't pee on myself on my way. Surgery is scheduled for Friday morning and as relieved as I am at the thought of having it over, I think it's adding to my nerves and sick feeling. There still a ton of stuff to do around here. I'm going to try to get this blog caught up. Get my SPF posted, early of course although I may be able to wait until really early Friday morning.

SO I'm gonna head out of here and try to get things cleaned up around here. I need to get laundry finished and try to keep it at a minimal among other things so there's not a lot to do when I come home and Terry goes back to work. So I'll check in later. I'm outta hea!

Forever and a Day

2006-07-17T12:27:00.000-05:00

Okay so it's been a while, sue me. There's just been a flurry of activity and a roller coaster of emotions around here. We finished up the baseball/t-ball season; there has been 2 babies born, Terry and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary, the refinancing finally went through and many, many more things. So we'll start with the most important things first...

Babies

First let me introduce Landen Dennis, he finally decided to make an appearance on June 14th at 11:35 pm. He weighed 4lbs 12oz and was 18 inches long and the Drs decided he was 7 weeks early. He only stayed in the hospital for 12 days and then was sent home for a life of luxury by the pool with mommy. He is so sweet. He looks so much like his daddy. I'll post more pictures as I get them. I didn't want to take to many picture while I was at the hospital visiting because technically I wasn't supposed to be in the NICU, Grandparents and siblings only.

This is Isaiah Matthew. Isaiah was born on July 14th at 4:45 pm (he took his time) and weighed 8lbs 1oz and was 20 inches long. He's also a cutie! I was up close and personal for his birth. His mommy called me at 4:30 in the morning to let me know her water had broken and she was on her way to the hospital. So I dragged my bottom out of bed, grabbed my camera and tripod and headed off to meet her there. Mommy and baby are doing fine and are home now.

Congratulations Becki and Vicki on jobs well done, you both have beautiful baby boys, that I just realized are a month apart!!

Okay, I'll be back in a bit. I'm trying to post this stuff and some of my pictures aren't coming up so I'm going to give it a quick break.

SPF Friday

2006-07-14T11:43:00.000-05:00

Your Feet

Okay I don't have a recent picture and my toenails are in need of a new paint job. So this is as good as it's gonna get.

I think I have decent looking feet and I try to keep my nails painted and all pretty. I did slip here in the last few weeks and need to jump start them again and I will, just as soon as I can bend over far enough to do them.

SPF Catch Up

2006-07-13T11:11:00.000-05:00

As I'm trying to catch up on my blog, I realize I am 5 weeks out from SPF. So what I've done in the spirit of catching up and Shaun and Kristine's wedding, I've picked only the wedding pictures for my catch up. You know, Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue... So here goes...

Something Old

This was my Mammaw's Jewelry box. I remember as a child getting to play dress up with all the pretties she had in it. Somehow it was one of the things that her son didn't try to sell on Ebay when she passed and I ended up with. Now it holds my pretties and hers. I hope to pass this on to Sarah when she's older.

Something New

This little jewelry box was given to me by my mother in law for my birthday. It's very cute and musical. I use it to put my jewelry I have on now in. Like when I'm cooking, or doing something I need to take jewelry off for, it usually goes in here. My other one is so full stuff would get lost in it and it would be a pain to try to find.

Something Borrowed

Okay so this wasn't really borrowed. It does however belong to my friend and needs to find it's way back home. She was having issues with it and I thought I could fix it and I still think I can, but now we're missing a piece. She said not to worry about it, but it bugs me that I took it apart and I know it's fixed and will work, but this one piece is enough to screw it up. Oh well, so there's my borrowed picture... How about this, the printer that's living on "borrowed" time? That'll work...

Something Blue

Okay I'll have to come back and try to repost my "Something Blue" picture. Blogger as usual has another plan in mind. I think they just do this to piss me off. And it works.

10 Years and Going Strong

2006-07-12T18:40:00.000-05:00

Today is our 10 year wedding anniversary. We've hit some rough patches that at times I didn't think we'd get through. I think though as both of us sit back and reflect on the good, it far outweighs any bad. I love Terry very much, with all of my being and heart, but man he can try a saints patience.

So I just thought I'd jump in and say Happy Anniversary and show off my pretty new bracelet and jump back out. Sees ya'll later...

4th of July

2006-07-06T16:13:00.000-05:00

Okay so don't poke fun at my fireworks pictures, they aren't the greatest. For the first time in several years, well since Grandma Morrow passed away, bought fireworks in abundance. I really miss those days, they were so much fun. So anyways upon Terry's suggestion we took them out to his sister's house for a cookout and let them off.

SO we had a relatively good time and came home.

Camp Stoney Brook

2006-07-01T14:46:00.000-05:00

About a week before the girls were set to go off to camp, I stopped by Ms. Merriman's house to pick up some forms for Sarah. As she sits down to make copies of the forms her phone rings and it's her assistant. She was calling to let her know she couldn't do camp. This is all coming last minute completely overwhelmed her and brought her to tears. I told her I could see what I could do, but wasn't sure because Terry had just started his new job.

Anyways, we ended getting Terry's step-brother to come over and stay with the kids while he worked and off to camp I went. 9 little girls, 2 mini-vans, and a lot of gear. Our PA was Picasso (all of the girls had nicknames) and I really liked her although Ms. Merriman wasn't very impressed with her. I liked that she had certain expectations of the girls and they were mainly to follow the rules of camp and be respectful.

So, Sarah made a special friend, Puddles, and anytime Puddles was near Sarah was by her side.

The girls had a blast, and I think over all so did we. I'm actually hoping to go again next year.

Ap - er - ture

2006-06-09T14:25:00.000-05:00

Kristine left this one wide open (no pun intended) for me to do my way. There is a little of sarcasm in the first set, but as you read, you'll understand why.

1. Wide Open Space...

68 acres of wide open space. Is what's here. Lost because some adults were to greedy to work together to keep it for the family. The grandkids had already agreed, together, we could pay the property taxes and keep things the way they were. The parents were just worried about their portion of the sale. The tree, this is the tree that 4 generations ran around, planted flowers around each spring and sat under on those lazy hot days. The house was about 20 yards from the tree, I could still see it standing there with grandma on the porch, when I was taking these pictures. The memories came flooding back and it was hard to keep the tears from coming too. My 2 oldest remember Grandma Margaret, and knew exactly where we were...

2. Brightness

For as much as I might complain about his behavior, this is one of the smartest kids I know. He may not have received it for the full year, but his year end award was for a getting a 4.0. I feel like he also should have received an award for most improved, but I don't think they do that.

3.In the Dark

I have tried over and over to post this damned picture and it says it's loaded, but it never shows up. I'm going to walk away for a few before I totally flip out and try again later.

After holding a gun the screen of the computer and telling it it better start working to suit me or out it goes (kinda like you do the car) it decided I could post my picture. Truth is it isn't my picture, it's Eddie and Rita's from their honeymoon. I didn't have any night pictures and forgot to get any last night.

Happy SPF!!

I snook away for a moment

2006-06-06T09:47:00.000-05:00

I gotta be quick or the kids might get by with something they shouldn't and I'll be to blame for it. Anyways here's a recent conversations between me and snot face...

"What do you want from the stand?"
"Popcorn"
"Okay, Terry, Bring me a drink and a pretzel, Ian a popcorn and you can have something too."

Terry runs off to get all the goodies and snot face and I get all situated and comfy to watch Cody and Sarah play. Terry comes back with everything we asked for and a snowcone for himself. Oh gosh! Someone stop the world snot face has noticed this and is about to explode! He now wants a pretzel too. SO I give him my pretzel trying to appease him (my allergies are acting up and I really don't feel all to great). He doesn't want that.

After many magic ticks that would have impressed Houdini I finally pull it out of him he wants a snowcone. Okay Terry, please run back down to the stand and get another pretzel and another snowcone and another drink for me (see if they'll slip some jack in it).

So Terry comes back with another pretzel, a snowcone and another drink (no jack) and I think we're alright now. At least I hope we are.

The rest of the week

2006-06-04T16:24:00.000-05:00

This week has been one huge roller coaster. I'm at one of the really low spots right now, but we'll save that for later.

The Appraisal

The house didn't appraise for what we thought it would, but I still don't think it did bad. There are a lot of unanswered questions I've asked and they keep tip toeing around, but I can't handle much more and have been doing this whole thing pretty much on my own. Numbers just don't add up. I've asked Terry to ask his mom to go to the office with me to get the answers, but so far nothing has come of that.

School

Terry has pulled some pretty stupid stunts here in the last few weeks and I've made a total ass out of myself only to find out he's lied about this that or the other. I don't know what I'm going to do about that. I'm about to pull my hair out over that stuff.

SPF Friday

I didn't play. I'm sure you can already see that. I was without internet for a few days, things are tight around here and by the time I got it back it was late, I was in a crappy mood and just didn't do it.

Baseball

We had 2 games yesterday. Sarah and COdy's was early, well at 11 if you call that early. Terry's was later, a lot later. We only had one field the big kids could play on because of the rain we had had the last few days. So we had to wait our turn. I think we finally got to play about 2 and was there until 4:30. It was this sky that burned the snot out of me...

Which of course got me in trouble.

Lastly Today...

As of today I think I'm done. Done with everything. Terry told me to sign over custody of the kids to him and move out. From what he says he pretty much has the backing of his family (of course) and my family as well. Mainly because I constantly am fighting with little Terry to do what he has been asked to do. Everyone thinks I'm to hard on him. I told him it would be a cold day in hell before I willingly gave up custody of my kids. Come Tuesday (the supposed date of the closing on the refinancing) I'm going up to Staples and buying one of those do it yourself divorce kits and am going to hand it to him with the receipt, he can either file or return it. I don't care anymore. I'm tired of crying over this. I'm tired of the threats of it. I'm just tired.

Well I guess I'm off to either throw out the rest of the kids toys or make them pick them up, because Terry's asleep on the couch, he deserves to nap when he wants. I'm not supposed to take a few minutes to myself and when I do it's usually to run to the store or some other errand that involves taking a couple of kids with me. Chat later.

Memorial Day

2006-05-30T15:58:00.000-05:00

Damn! The alarm clock went off and it's 7:30 in the morning on a holiday! Sarah is in the parade today and we have to have her down there by 8:45. So that's 4 mouths to feed, 1 girl to get gussied up to walk over a mile in the hot sun, on a day when we should be sleeping until noon and finishing up the painting. I got some decent pictures, even though there is a huge hair on the inside of my camera I can't get to, guess I'll have to take it to Ritz to have it cleaned. We'll start off with Hamilton High's Marching band, they sounded and looked great! The other picture would be Chas, my little cousin. She's going to kill me shortly after she sees this so if I don't post for a long time, you'll know why.

Then we'll skip on to the way too cute for words Hamilton Big Blue Cheerleaders. Sarah is in there somewhere cheering her little heart out.

You can see here where her heart lies. It's me out there taking pictures but it's Daddy she's yelling hi too.

SO that's about it. Nothing more to report other than we got the rooms finished or as finished as they're going to get.

Landen Hasn't Landed Yet

2006-05-27T10:16:00.000-05:00

Poor Becki has had a rough week. with all the nurses coming and going every half hour or so or one of us calling or text messaging her. She still continues to have contractions, but they are thinking the contractions are more Braxton Hicks than anything, which is a good sign. They moved her to another hospital that is reputed to be the best in the area in the perinatal area. AT first we were all kinda pissed until we heard about the perinatal thing. SO they have monitored her for a few days and did a sonogram yesterday. I just talked to her and they say there is enough fluid around the baby and she may be able to go home on Tuesday on stict bed rest. This is good news to us, the longer Landen remains where he is the better and if she's not up moving around so that the leak can leak, then she will continue to produce fluid. So good job Landen staying where you are and we'll see you when you get here!

It's About Auschwitz

2006-05-26T12:06:00.000-05:00

This week Kristine said it was about Auschwitz. Now she's gonna make me have to go and google this to even have a clue, but anyways... I played this week and I played on time, I deserve a reward of some type... Money is always a nice reward...lol!

So on with the pics!

1. My suitcase or travel bag.

I had 2 half decent suitcases that I somehow had ended up with after my mammaw went into the nursing home, but I don't know what ever happened to them. So, besides the fact I have 4 kids and never go away for more than a day or 2 anyways, here's my Wal-Mart special travel bag that I absolutely love!

2. My Ground

I had this great idea and even took the picture and had this whole thing in my head to go with the picture and changed my mind. I'm tired and just in one of those moods. There will be improvements here shortly, like a privacy fence and that type of thing, just have to get through this refinancing. I can't complain though, I have a huge yard and plenty of room for the kids to play. Just the dog has worn a path along the fence line and we want to repair it and plant flowers and all that good stuff.
So with out further ado, my ground...

3. Something I'm Powerless To

This one was the hard one for me, it changes with the wind. I guess the main thing I'm pwerless to is my kids. I'm powerless to their pain, I'm powerless to their love. There are so many things about them I'm powerless to. This doesn't mean they get by with anything, because believe me they don't (just ask the city police officer that watched me spank Sarah for throwing herself down and having a screaming fit at her brother's game the other night). They may think they do, but we remind them constantly, we've (dad and I) already told that one, tell us something new. Or in Kristine's words my eyebrows disappear into me hair line. So here goes...

I played! Did you?

Kindergarten Bound

2006-05-25T20:06:00.000-05:00

Cody "graduated" today and is kindergarten bound. They had a small ceremony in their class, mainly just awards for field day. I just can't believe how fast they grow, next thing I know his dad will be teaching him how to shave.

Cody's Class

Cody being very shy because I'm there with a camera

Cody's future wife (I think even her mom agrees)

Yesterday's Post

2006-05-24T22:33:00.000-05:00

Yesterday's post couldn't be truer. Just as you think it can't get and worse it does. I got my kitchen half way cleaned up, ran up to the drug store to get some prescriptions filled, left my ID behind (whole 'nother story), went back up to drug store and got ID. SO I get home realize I don't have my ID with my insurance cards, call the pharmacist tell him where I was sitting and he says no, nothing there. I go out to the van, double check, it's not in there and continue to drive on up there to find my little folder with everything in it sitting right there in plain sight where I told him it was. ASS!

I'm trying to get things organized today, I have to meet Nancy up at the birth certificate place to get Ian's birth certificate for school so I'm just doing little things like rearranging the flowers and so forth. Coming back up the steps I twisted my ankle, bad. I manage to wobble into the house and call Terry, the whole time I'm in total hysterics, not from pain, but from being totally overwhelmed with everything going on, then this. He's miles away and really can't do anything, my mom is downtown at appointments with my grandma, the only person left is my mother in law. SO I call her, I'm still sobbing so bad I can barely breath, I can't drive myself, I have 2 kids here and what am I going to do. 2 more kids are at school, I'm just losing my mind. SO I take 2 of my nerve pills, just to calm myself down, we call 911, because she has 4 of the other grandkids and there is no where to stick me injured and 6 kids, Terry is leaving work early so he can get the other 2 from school on time and get me from the hospital when I call.

I have a broken bone in my foot that they don't cast and a severe sprain. I will be painting and puttying and repairing spots on the walls upstairs with my new best friend and her side kicks...

If You're Going Through Hell

2006-05-23T22:49:00.000-05:00

I'm having a particularly rotten evening and on my way home I heard this song and it kinda hit home and made me think. You all should be thankful there isn't a video code for it yet or you'd have to hear it for a couple of days...

Well, you know those times when you feel like
There's a sign there on your back.
Says: "I don't mind if you kick me,
Seems like everybody has."
Things go from bad to worse.
You think they can't get worse than that an' then they do.

You step off the straight an' narrow,
An' you don't know where you are.
Use the needle of your compass,
To sew up your broken heart.
Ask directions from a genie,
In a bottle of Jim Beam an' she lies to you.

Well, that's when you learn the truth.
If you're goin' through hell,
Keep on goin'.
Don't slow down,
If you're scared don't show it.
You might get out,
'Fore the devil even knows you're there.

Well, I've been deep down in that darkness,
I been down to my last match.
Felt a hundred different demons,
Breathin' fire down my back.
An' I knew that if I stumbled,
I'd fall right into the trap that they were layin', yeah.

But the good news is there's angels,
Everywhere out on the street.
Holdin' out a hand,
To pull you back up on your feet.
The one's that you been draggin' so long,
You're on your knees; you might as well be prayin'.

Guess what I'm sayin',
If you're goin' through hell,
Keep on goin'.
Don't slow down,
If you're scared don't show it.
You might get out,
'Fore the devil even knows you're there.

Yeah, if you're goin' through hell,
Keep on movin'.
Face that fire,
Walk right through it.
You might get out,
'Fore the devil even knows you're there.
Oooh.

If you're goin' through hell,
Keep on goin'.
Don't slow down,
If you're scared don't show it.
You might get out,
'Fore the devil even knows you're there.

Yeah, if you're goin' through hell,
Keep on movin'.
Face that fire,
Walk right through it.
You might get out,
'Fore the devil even knows you're there.

Yeah, you might get out,
'Fore the devil even knows you're there.
Yeah.
Ooh, ooh ooh.
Oh.

Bad Daughter

2006-05-22T08:24:00.000-05:00

I'm a bad, bad daughter this morning... I called my mom bright and early, around 8:30 to see if there was any news. So far no baby. They are trying to hold off as long as possible which I know can be good as long as her fluid levels stay safe. Of course there is also the factor of the demeral/phenergan cocktail she is receiving to counteract the horrible side effects of the magnesium (btdt).*Funny story* I was in labor with Sarah and my Dr had finally decided to make his appearance (I always did like him, really) and I told him I felt really sick and he waved it off and said it's just one of the effects of the magnesium, you'll be okay. About 30 seconds later (I'm sitting up) I projectile vomited all down the front of his pretty white dr's coat and clean scrubs he had just dawned for me *end of funny story*

So anyways, I guess a no show is better than a show and I'm happy if they are happy and we'll see you soon sweet Landen!

Babies, Birthdays and Baseball Games

2006-05-21T10:49:00.000-05:00

I know I've mentioned my sweet, sweet sister in law (well she's my sister in law now) Becki before. She's the one that a keeper. The one that if anything ever happens, we'll kick my brother out and keep her and her girls. Well she's due to have a baby. The Doctor says she's due July 18th, going by her last you know, and the nurses say she's due at the end of July because they only go by the sonograms. This poor little girl and I do mean LITTLE has had 2 10 pound babies, so the nurses need to get their heads outta their butts and get with the program. Anyways her water broke and has been leaking since Friday. She's having contractions and they are doing everything they can to stop them just to keep little Landen in there a little longer for his little lungs to get stronger. So I spent half of Saturday at the ball field for 2 separate games and then went to the hospital for a couple of hours. Bless her heart she's so tired and my brother... My poor brother, I know he's scared, we all are and I hate to see them going through this. I called her again this evening around 5 to see how things were going, and woke her up, I'm an awful sister in law, and told her to go back to sleep , I'll call my mom first thing in the morning. I know they can't hold it off the labor much longer. I'll just keep hoping and praying everything goes smoothly and everything turns out great and we have a healthy baby boy.

After all of that I headed out to our aunts house for the May birthday party. I know Aunt Emma turned 50, but there was a whole slew of birthdays in may and there's no way I could tell you who else had a birthday. I think I was the only sober one there, for once. What can I say I do like beer. I just had other things on my mind and have an ear open for that phone to ring. I waited until I knew everyone was settled in or was going where ever they were going safely and headed back to my house and crashed hard, I was so tired.

Then had to be up, kids fed washed and ready to go out the door to a ball game at 2 and another at 4. SO I headed out with Sarah and Cody and Terry brought little Terry and Ian up for Terry's game at 4. I think I'm just going to build a little house out there because I have a feeling we're gonna be spending a lot of time there. This week alone Terry has 5 games (make up games from the rain) and sarah and Cody have 2. Sarah has mandatory cheerleading practice because of the Memorial day parade this week. There's gonna be a lot of lunchmeat sandwiches for dinner this week.

Well, It's really late, I have an early morning and to busy of a schedule to try to nap this week so I'm out of here and I'll post some pics at some point and tomorrow I'll try to get up my SPF pics. HUGS all!! Prayers for and easy night Chris, Becki and Landen!

SPF Wave of Moderation

2006-05-19T12:13:00.000-05:00

Lets see... Kristine and WoM have some awesome ideas and I would love to do them. I would have attempted to do them also but I will give you a few choices of why I haven't...

a. I have taken up residence and become a pawn of Satan (for Ali, Diana, and Marie)
b. Terry blew my van up and while he's fixing it he took BOTH sets of keys.
c. The world has come to an end.
d. Terry blew my van up and took both sets of keys.
e. All of the above, after all I must be marked with a black tear of Satan...LOL

I will try to post my SPF pics later after Terry gets my van fixed after all he did blow it up, and so far I DON'T see a black tear on my face and if taking up residence with Satan means one of these sweet sweet children then I must have. Now I'm off to try to revive my flowers after not planting them right and trying to kill them.

I Must Be Going to Hell

2006-05-16T12:58:00.000-05:00

I'm sure if you ask that's the consensus. It was kinda of like being in the "Mean Girls" if you didn't agree with what they "saw" in the pictures then the password was changed and you weren't given it. Of course they wouldn't accept blame for this, this would be handed down from the SXO or XO or CEO or whatever the heck he/it was, I just know I was never good enough to go before it. Of course come to think of it, I don't think I tried very hard, I was to busy in other aspects of my life. I thought I had made a very good friend through the experience and I hate to think that he would listen to a bunch of hens rather than make up his own mind and speak to me about the issue at hand, but hey life will go on.

I think the funniest part of it all is the accusation of jealousy. I'm not sure what there is to be jealous of. I wish somewhere along the line I could figure that one out. I DO think however if the one's without admin powers were to find out how much fun you make of them in your special little lounge, or how you slam TAPS members, people would learn who you really are.

Oh well, shit happens, we learn from it. Keep coming back, I enjoy you visiting.

Mother's Day 2006

2006-05-14T15:36:00.000-05:00

What can I say? It was just another day. Terry was a little on the contrary side, but what's new, right? We went to Aunt Cathy's house for dinner then headed over to his mom's house to visit. Sarah made me the sweetest little sparkly card for mothers day and the card Terry made just blew me away. There are times when I could choke the crud out of him then there are the sweet little things like the card he made that just bowl me over. I cheated this year, usually I make my cards, but I bought everyone cards, I've just been to busy to sit down to make them. I still have one to send out to Vicki and one to take to Mammaw's grave. Oh yeah, I was supposed to head out to Louisville this weekend, but with the rain and it being chilly out Sarah and I decided to hold off for a pretty weekend. At least we have the whole summer to play with no kids, right Sarah!

Loves ya'lls!

SPF Friday

2006-05-12T15:00:00.000-05:00

Assignment in Pairs

I kinda liked Kristina's thought of everyone flashing their boobies, then I thought everyone on Socom would then see how saggy mine really are. Water Bras baby! Make those girls look good and give them just the right bounce! SO anyways on to the assignment I came up with the perfect pics for me! Here goes...

1. Something I have 2 of.

Truth be known I would rather have a 3rd row seating midnight blue Suburban, but since this isn't currently an option for me I have to decide between the two I already have...

This is the one I currently drive. I hate this piece of crap. It hates me too. Not only is it crappy looking outside, it's crappy looking on the inside...

This would be the one I would like to drive. I bought her 3 years ago with promise of a motor being put in it and still waiting. She's not the best looking, but much better looking than that other thing. Soon she will be on the road, if I have to get out there and start tearing her up my self (which I've been known to do)

2. Something you wish you had 2 more of.

If I had 2 more of these I might get more done around here. It would be so nice to not have a husband bitching about how embarrassing his house is.

3. "Two"
I did the best I could...

Week 4

2006-05-06T17:06:00.000-05:00

Isn't she just flourishing? She actually had a strawberry starting to form, but someone, I won't mention any names coughcoughsarahcoughcodycoughiancough, damn have to do something about this horribly cough, took a tiny bite out of the tip of it and licked it. Such is life.

SPF Friday

2006-05-05T17:31:00.000-05:00

This week Kristine kinda made us think, so I thought and thought and couldn't think anymore...

Body of Water - think big or small…

I was in a hurry or I would have searched better for the body of water. I know one place I would love to get a picture of, but It's a little ways out and gas ain't cheap... So here goes...

Something with Flavor - yes, another wide open one

Okay I had this picture of a turkey I had cooked and OMG was it good! Is was so flavorful and juicy, but alas I cannot find the picture. So, I'll just share another picture of my mom's awesome cake...

Last but not least...

Plant Your Ass

There's my very own ass and where I tend to plant him. Some days he actually makes it onto the couch, other days he doesn't. Some nights he stays there, some nights he doesn't.

Happy SPF! I hope you played!

Boring Week

2006-05-04T17:16:00.000-05:00

Not a whole lot happened this week. It rained off and on so practices were far and few between. Terry's team was supposed to have a game on Monday, but it rained and we rescheduled. Played on Wednesday and got our butts kicked, it would have been close had htings been called properly. We play again this Saturday. Sarah and Cody were supposed to play on Tuesday, but with all the rain on Monday it was cancelled also. I took Sarah today to be fitted for her cheerleading outfit. Thankfully tomorrow is SPF so I might have something halfway interesting.

Sees ya'll later!

Week 3

2006-04-29T16:37:00.000-05:00

And so goes the Strawberry plant saga. It's getting bigger, I actually have a bloom on it now.
I won't go on and on about it or anything. Talk at ya later!!

Opening Day

2006-04-29T15:38:00.000-05:00

Today was Opening Day for our league. There were so many kids, parents, grand-parents, aunts, uncles and so on. I was really moved by the experience, but you have to keep in mind that this was my first time. I actually teared up when they introduced our teams.

Terry's team played first and it was a little slow going. Terry did really good, got to first base before they called the game over. Thankfully today was just opening day and not an actual game. None of the kids had ever played in a machine pitch game or practice so it was a little awkward.

Sarah and Cody's team played last and they kicked some major butt. Both teams looked and did good. Sarah played well and Cody just didn't seem to be very interested in it. Maybe Cody will start to like it more as they play games, we'll see.

Good job guys! You all did wonderful and we're all proud of you!

It's how you look at it

2006-04-28T23:13:00.000-05:00

Okay, so damn it, I had the entire post ready to go, ready to hit publish and hit enter instead. SO I have to do it all over again...

This week made me have to use my brain. Some would say that's a feat all of it's own. At this time I would have to agree. With out further ado (and because I want to go to bed), here goes...

Something Big

He big! He's fat! He's gianormous! He's Jake and he's to freaking close to my camera! Back off fatty!

Something Small

He's not so small now, but he used to be. I'll always remember him as this little bundle of love...

Half of Something

Okay I had to rack my brain to find something for this description. Everything in this house is either full (and not for long) or completely empty. I thought about using my beer, but it was empty before I could get the lense cap off of the camera to take a picture. Then I remembered Kristine said to think OUTSIDE of the house. So I have something all of us ladies will like...

HALF NEKKID MEN!

When do YOU truly feel beautiful?

2006-04-26T15:50:00.000-05:00

I was catching up on reading everyone's blogs and came across this question on one of the regular ones. When do you truly feel beautiful? That's a difficult question for me to answer. It comes and goes. Some days I'm so self conscious I can't stand it and other days I'm alright, then there are the days when I feel like shouting look out world here I come! Those days are few and very far between though. I can go all out and fix my hair, put on some make up and in one slight glance in the mirror see the whole facade fall before me. Weight is a big issue for me and I too try to hide it from the kids, or at least hide how it affects me. Terry says I'm fine, but I remember a time when he thought I was hot. Heck I remember a time when I thought I was hot. Not so hot anymore. Not even luke warm. I hate for anyone to point a camera my direction. I thought I was going to die when the newspaper was taking pictures during a meeting a couple of weeks ago. Thank God they didn't use my picture.

To actually answer the question... I think the only time I've ever felt truly beautiful has been when those sweet little eyes, that rely on you so much, look to you with unconditional love. Those precious little eyes see me as the most beautiful person in the world. That's when I've felt truly beautiful.

Mmmm... Strawberries...

2006-04-22T16:13:00.000-05:00

Okay so I'm sure you could care less about my strawberries, but I've decided to keep track of their growth with weekly pictures. Other than the occasional flower, I've really never tried to grow anything. So here goes...

This first picture is the day after I planted them on the planter. They came already rooted and ready to be put in the dirt.

This is a week later. They grow like wild fire. I've already threatened the kids that is they touch my strawberries before they are ready they might lose their fingers. This is actually gonna be fun! Now all I have to do is go plant my phlox, hydrangea and some other flower I grow every year, but forgot the name of.

See ya's all later...

You've Got To JAM With Us...

2006-04-17T21:28:00.000-05:00

You've got to, got to Jam with us! This is what they are screaming all out of sinc, but it's so funny to listen and watch! This is the kindergarten and first grade Hamilton Little Blue Cheerleaders. They are so cute! I can't wait until we get their uniforms, it'll be a treat all in itself.

Sarah is just loving it. She loves the idea of being the front and center of attention (maybe not in the group, but as a whole). I made her "show" me her cheers when we got home so Daddy could see them, then made her show me again so Aunt Lori could see them too. They are just too cute! They won't actually start cheering at the football games until fall, but they will do 2 parades and start competitions over the summer. I've talked to her a little bit about the competitions, but I don't think she quite understands it yet. We'll cross that bridge when we get to it. I just can't wait though, these little girls have tons of spirit and they are just precious. I'll update as we go and post more pictures as I get them. See ya'll later!

Happy Easter!!

2006-04-16T19:09:00.000-05:00

Just wanted to jump in and wish everyone a Happy Easter! I hope all went well in the candy department and with the egg hunting skills. My kids had an absolute blast and even made a couple of dollars along the way. Thank you to both my family and Terry's family for not overloading the kids with candy. They got stuffed animals and out door toys instead.

We went to my sister in laws house first and ate. Then sent the kids out to find eggs. Somewhere in the mix of things someone grabbed the wrong thing of eggs and a trip home had to be made.

After hunting eggs we all sat around for a bit and talked. Made fun of each other and just over all enjoyed one another's company before heading off to the other families.

So off we went to my families house and hunted some more eggs until the weather turned sour. I hope everyone had a nice Easter and everyone has as many eggs as we do...

You all are in so much trouble...

2006-04-15T16:16:00.000-05:00

This is what I kept telling the kids as they played and played in the mud. It wasn't just any mud, it's the mud where Daddy keeps putting grass seed and telling them to stay away from. The same place where when it rains or they turn the water on washes the dirt out onto the sidewalk. I actually had to keep myself from laughing, they were such a mess. They had it in their hair, on their clothes, everywhere. I just stood there and kept taking pictures. I couldn't resist it.

I'm not afraid of dirt and I know the mud will wash off, but as long as they enjoyed themselves that's all that really matters. And they did!

Now I'm off to hide somewhere before Daddy gets home because I'm sure to catch hell for letting them make this mess... See ya'll later!

SPF Friday

2006-04-14T16:36:00.000-05:00

This week is pre-Easter

1. My Peeps - introducing you to some of my friends outside of the blog world.
I only have a few and they are all way far away from me, except for Vicki and Lori, but here's some pics anyways...

This is Rita, isn't she beautiful? She's my sounding board and she doesn't mind when I get bipolar. Sometimes we have to gang up on the guys and show who has the biggest set. We've been friends for about a year and a half, but I feel like we've been friends forever. I wuv you Rita!

Next is Lori... I get to be bipolar with Lori, she's bipolar too. She's actually my aunt, but we're more like buddies than relatives. We drink together, cuss the husbands together and talk about how nutty the rest of our family really is. The guy with her is my uncle, my mom's brother.

This is Vicki, she'll kill me if and when she sees the picture I posted. These are our youngest (well my youngest, her youngest is due in July). We've been through a lot of crap together. She lives out in God's land so we don't see each other a lot, but we can burn the phone lines up when we're not running from one practice to another.

Last but not least is my SOCOM crew. I think of everyone of them as friends and family. I just couldn't forget to add them.

I would post a picture of the best friend I have in the world, we've been best friends since we were 12 years old. She lives about 100 miles away and we get to see each other a couple of times a year. I don't have any pictures of her, mainly because she'd kick my ass if I pulled a camera out. She is definitely a beautiful person and I love her with all my heart.

2. Something Fuzzy - *shaking head* Kristine said we had to keep it clean.

This fuzzy woke me up at 4 this morning when it started storming. It's a wonder I let her live. Isn't she pretty?

3. Something/Someone I want to dye/die

My roots.

Batter's Up!

2006-04-11T21:49:00.000-05:00

Amazingly Terry seems to have a gift for swinging the bat. During games and practices they are thrown 6 balls, he popped 5 of the 6 out to the fence. I was truly amazed. Here he is 9 years old and has never really played sports except for the occasional back yard game and he's kicking butt with players that have been playing for a while. His coach is really impressed too. She told me at practice that she wants to make sure he remembers her when he hits the major leagues.

Take Me Off Auto

2006-04-07T01:12:00.000-05:00

This week Kristine said to think outside of the box, which was a great idea. I love doing the little assignments, gives me a creative outlet and an excuse to take pictures of stuff I normally wouldn't. So here goes...

Macro

I got so close I was afraid I was going to drop the camera or it's strap in the cake.

No Flash

This one wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, but I also messed around with the film speed. This is an overcast cloudy day with the blinds and door open.

Perspective- Get up high or get down low...

This is one of my older pictures, I forgot about the perspective picture. This is WAY UP HIGH!

So again this was a fun one! Hope everyone has a nice Friday! Did you play?

Happy Birthday To You!

2006-04-06T22:39:00.000-05:00

I just made it to the 2 year anniversary of my 30th year. Some how everyone around me made it, no casualties or deaths. You know birthdays don't bother me. I don't get depressed and cry over another year. It's just another day to me. Unless there's a huge milestone, like getting your drivers license or drinking legally, then it's not a big deal to me. My stepmom brought over a beautiful cake (thank you mom!!) and a Longaberger basket I have been lusting for for the last 5 years. My mother in law sent me a beautiful little musical jewelry box (thank you too mom!!). My kids made me cards at school today (thank you kids!!). My grandmother sent me a really pretty little card (thank you Grandma!!). My mother (biological mother) called me, at least she remembered. My husband? Well, he got off work around 6pm, went to his mom's house and walked through the door around 10pm, ate dinner, said happy birthday and went to sleep. Does this bother me? Should this bother me? I think so. He stopped at the store to get milk, couldn't he have bought a .99 cent card? Is this some form of punishment for the fight we had over the weekend? At this point just screw it. To hell with it all. So I'll say it... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

Here's to another year wiser, a clean house and cold late night dinner.

Another Day

2006-04-04T19:12:00.000-05:00

On Wednesday (early morning), the time and date will be 01:02:03 04/05/06. It will only happen once in our lifetime.

Doctors and Nurses... Oh My!
So, this morning I call my mom in tears, begging her to come pick Cody up and take him to school so I can head off to the doctor again. I think this has been going on close to 4 weeks, but I've always had issues fighting any kind of bronchial infections. SO this time I went back to my old doctor (which I should have done in the first place) and she's taking care of me. I'm not saying the other doctor hasn't been taking care of me, because he has, but the rest of his office SUCK! They are the rudest bunch I've ever come across and for what I pay (or Terry pays) for insurance, I sure as hell don't deserve to be treated like they treat me. That's the main reason I decided to go back to my old doctor. The other reason is I told the new one that antibiotics do not work for me when it comes to this cough/chest thing, that the only thing that works is the Z pack and he didn't listen. Hence the coughing to the point of gagging for close to 4 weeks.

This shall forever be written in history as the day Shawn's self confidence dropped through the floor. I got on the scale at the doctor's office and damn! Double damn! They even had me stand on their new scale to make sure the other one "still wasn't acting up". I won't go into the gory details, but it was way bad. You know it's not like I eat a whole bunch and I rarely snack. Terry says it from lack of activity, so I guess my fat ass needs to get up and start moving. Start walking, start exercising (remember the videos I bought back in December) and get the fat off. I can't stand being this way and I know how people look at me. I've made all the excuses in the past too... Can't do anything because I always have the kids... I'm to tired today... No one to go with... I can't keep procrastinating, I have to do something. I also keep saying I'd like to look into the gastro intestinal bypass, but what good would that do me if I don't eat that much anyways? Maybe I should have my doctor run thyroid tests. Oh well, first thing is first and that's to start walking on a daily basis.

Well I'm off to do SOCOM Tuesday, it's that time again. Later guys!

It Will All Make Sense In The End

2006-04-02T19:21:00.000-05:00

My Washer and Dryer

My dryer sucks. My newer one broke and this one was sitting out in the garage, it's probably as old as me. I'll either have to win the lottery or wait until tax time next year to replace them.

My washer goes through about 15 loads a week and has for about the last 3 years. I'm curious to know how long it will last...

My Robe

This robe was given to me by an ex boyfriend. I don't think Terry knows where it came from, but oh well. The only reason I keep it around is I haven't found a robe other than this one that's comfortable. Simple as that.

A Flower

Okay so everyone else posted pictures (lovely ones I might add) of their daffodils and I wanted something different. So this is a picture of what will bloom in a few months in my yard...

Baseball, T-Ball and Cheerleading

2006-03-30T16:58:00.000-05:00

Run, Run, Run, that's all I have done this week! Thankfully I'm feeling a lot better and now don't feel as if I'm dying. Terry has baseball tonight, Cody and Sarah have T-ball and I'm just waiting for cheerleading to start.

So this year I jumped in feet first without testing the water. I've taken on Policy Council for Butler County's Head Start Program. Let me tell, that is a mess all of it's own. I signed my 2 oldest boys up for Baseball/T-ball and Sarah decided at the first practice she wants to play also. Sarah is also signed up for cheerleading and Girl Scouts. So if I'm not out at the diamond, I'm either at a meeting raising hell about the mismanagement of federal Head Start funds or at Girl Scouts. I know it's good for the kids to have activities and I know I'll get used to running all the time, but boy just starting all of this at once... I'm not complaining, I enjoy watching the kids have a good time. So far it looks like Terry has a pretty decent pitch, but I don't know anything about pitching. We'll see how well he does with batting tonight. Cody and Sarah will start ground ball catches tonight, this will be their first official practice.

SPF Catch Up

2006-03-29T19:07:00.000-05:00

As I said before I want to do a SPF catch up post. If you get bored with it, I'll understand. I won't go into any extended info or explanations with the pictures, just the title, the assignment and picture. Alrighty then, here goes...

Like Yesterdays Paper

My Garbage Can

My Junk Drawer

My Trunk

Okay this is actually the husbands trunk, only because mine is messed up again and I can't get it open.

Randomless Galore

Favorite Jeans

Birthmark, Moles or Freckles

My Photo Albums and Where I Keep Them

Brought To You By The Letter "C"

My Couch

My Coat

My Candles

It's Kristine's Birfday!

Sorry no pictures for this. Kristine, you are a fabulous, witty, intelligent woman! At least I fulfilled the "word" portion of it!

Hope you had a good one!

My Tagboard

2006-03-28T13:32:00.000-05:00

Ugh! I absolutely loved having a tag board, but evidently no one speaks english and they all had to leave messages I couldn't read. So I have removed it, at least for the time being. Maybe these people will find some other blog to post to.

So I got up this morning and have an ear infection, it hurts so bad. When does this crap stop? I am sick and tired of being sick and tired! I had planned on sitting here all day long to update my blog and get it all back in order, but alas I'm off to the land of ODing on Tylenol and Amoxicillan.

Hello, Hello, Hello

2006-03-28T03:22:00.000-05:00

Jeez oh peets! It's been what, a month? I'm sorry, I've been so caught up with everything from policy council (Cody's school) to being sick on and off for the last 3 weeks. I'm going to spend the next few days updating and catching up with everything I haven't done in the last month. Forgive me when my blog appears to be overrun with SPF stuff, I'm 3 weeks behind there. I also have pictures from the boys birthday party, pictures from Chippendales, and just a multitude of other things. Chippendales... Well that was definitely interesting to say the least.

So anyways, I'll be back later, it's awful late here and I do need some sleep. Later guys! Hugs and Kisses!

9 Years and Going Strong

2006-03-19T16:06:00.000-05:00

I can't believe you are already 9. I remember the only thing I wanted after losing Dakota was a sweet baby boy to bring home with me. God granted my prayers the day I found out that you were a boy. I think that was the longest 9 months of my life. We were on pins and needles over every little thing, so afraid we'd lose you. Then the day came when the DR said lets go. I remember how relieved I was when they handed you to me, I searched your entire little body to make sure everything was there. !0 little fingers and 10 little toes to be kissed every morning. You were just the sweetest and such a good baby. Thank you God!

Now you're 9, where did the time go? You just keep growing. Sometimes I think if I put a brick on the top of your head, you'll at least slow down a little. You're getting to the point where it's not okay for me to kiss you or hug you in front of others. You're starting to find those places I'm just to tired to find on video games. You're writing in cursive. Time has just gotten away from us.

I just want you to know that I really do love you. It may seem at times I'm to hard on you and I may be, I apologize, I just want the best for you. You are extremely intelligent and sometimes I can't get past this when you do things you should know better than to do. I appreciate the help you give me. I love the way you love your baby brother. I have been truly blessed. Happy Birthday baby!

Party On Boys!

2006-03-11T17:00:00.000-05:00

Today we celebrated all 3 boys birthdays. It is so much easier (and cheaper) to it this way. I know a few people don't agree with me doing it this way, but oh well, life goes on. So anyways, the boys are growing so fast, soon they will be packing and heading off to college. They got a ton of stuff, enough to keep them busy for the next few days. Angie got them some clothes from Old Navy, she always gets the cutest stuff. My mom made the cake, I think it turned out cute.

Happy Birthday Cody!

2006-02-26T13:53:00.000-05:00

Okay so I won't go into the whole birth story like I did with Ian, but I will tell you 2 little stories...

My pregnancy with Cody was relatively uneventful, a huge surprise, but still uneventful. I remember the morning I found out, it was rainy and nasty outside. I remember waking up before the alarm went off and rolling over to debate why I should go into work that day with Terry. I just felt icky, a little under the weather and didn't feel like dealing with the idiots that I was working with (they weren't all idiots, just a lot of them were). First words out of Terry's mouth were "You're probably pregnant." His tone was so "matter of factly" that it gave me chills. So of course I punch him and tell him no way, it's not even that time yet, not to mention Sarah is only 5 months old. On top of all of that, I am on the pill. Get real there is no way I'm pregnant. I tell him you know what? I'll prove it to you, I had a test in the van that had been there for a while, but what they heck, right? I go into the bathroom, start my bath, pee on the stick and get into the bathtub. After about 10 minutes I look and there's nothing there, I knew it, and threw it into the garbage can. Terry comes in about 15 minutes later, pulls it out of the garbage can and says I told you so. Huh? No, it's negative! He shows it to me and sure enough theres 2 lines. It has to be a faulty test, it's been in the van for a while and not to mention it was thrown in the garbage, the directions say not to turn it or the results could be messed up... Right? I'm not feeling so sure now... How are we going to do this? I just had a baby, she's only 5 months old. Oh man there was a lot going through my mind.

SO 7 mnths later I have the beautiful little boy named Cody. His first 6 months were hard on all of us, he was colicky and I had major post partum depression. When I could get him to smile, he had the sweetest little smile. His little ears would move up and inch when he would smile. He was like a little elf.

Bless his little heart, he has been the giver of many funny times. He is such a little clown. Anything from secretly making his way around the camp site to get to Uncle Greg's coke to coming down dressed in Sarah's dress wearing lipstick. I know over the last 5 years I've shed many tears over you Cody, but you have blessed me with more laughs than you know. When you had your first seizure, your dad and I thought our world was going to crash down around us. When you split your head open, I thought I was going to have to kill the driver in front of me for not getting out of my way (he was actually trying to provoke me). Now you're 5 and will start kindergarten in the fall. You have grown so fast and I know time is going to fly by. Before I know it, you will be grown and on your own. I will cherish the time I have now and look forward to your learning and experiencing the world. I love you!

I swear, no more...

2006-02-24T19:08:00.000-05:00

OMG! I can see out the window and the snow is blanketing everything. I have no idea how Vicki is going to make from BFE here before this kid makes an appearance. I think she called, but the nurse was in here and I didn't dare answer my phone, after all it was my cell she called on. Terry, the turd, is sleeping peacefully (or as peacefully as you can get) over there. It's been a long night, they keep coming in to check my blood pressure and the baby's heartbeat. Seems like everytime I doze off there's another one at the door. The pain isn't to bad yet, but I'm not going to worry about it, I plan on getting an epidural just as soon as I can get a nurse in here. I'm gonna beg like no other to get it before they break my water. I figure this is my last one and I'm going out in style.

Okay so Vicki just called, she's on her way, but it's slow going. She lives about an hour out and in the middle of nowhere and they haven't started clearing the roads yet. I told her she didn't have to come, but she's on her way. Terry just ran off downstairs to get coffee, yeah, go ahead and torture me. I told him I am starting to feel a little pain, but so far it isn't to awful bad. I just called the nurses station and the nurse is on her way up to check me. She said they had to check how far I am before she can order my epi. I'll spare the details, brb...

So cool! She says I am 4cm now and she can order my epi, but I have to wait a little because they are in the middle of shift change and blah, blah, blah... She's standing at the end of my bed talking about something, but I've kinda tuned her out. I mean, no offense or anything, I'm just tired and am not wanting to hear this.

Oh hell! What just happened? I think the baby turned on my bladder or something because I am soaked. This is really embarrassing, I guess I have to tell the nurse, there's no way I'm laying in this. You want to check me again? Why? You think my water broke?

So from there on out I knew I was doomed. I remember looking over at Terry, in tears, and telling him I wouldn't get my epi. I knew I wouldn't. The nurse is trying to sooth me and call in the order at the same time, but I kept telling her not to, it would never happen. Then there was a little light at the end of the tunnel, she said the anesthesiologist was on her way up right now. WOW! I could only hope. She comes in, hooks me up and doses me so that there's an immediate pain reduction. Ian isn't waiting though. He's in a hurry, as he has been for the last 3 years, to make his appearance. An hour after this whole thing started, he's here. Dr wolf had just walked through the door and they were still prepping him when his head popped out. Somehow this birth had hurt more than the others, maybe it was the extra 3 lbs, not sure though.

To close I just wanted to wish you a happy 3rd birthday. You are so sweet, you're funny, and very much mine. You have been a pleasure to have around (for the most part) and I wouldn't trade you for anything.

Bedside Manner

2006-02-24T18:47:00.000-05:00

Inside My Nightstand Drawer

Hmmmmm, this could let my cat out of the bag... There's a mixture of things in there... Some sleazy story books, some old "toys" that I've been to lazy to throw away, my old glasses from like 13 years ago and just other small odds and ends. Nothing to spectacular.

A Good Book I've Read

I love to read when I'm not either just to tired to concentrate or on this contraption. Generally I have Nora Roberts parked close at hand, actually, I don't think I've read Blue Dahlia yet... I love Kathy Reichs and yes I do watch Bones, but has anyone else noticed the discrepancies between her books and the show? I also love Jude Devereaux (Kristine mentioned her in her blog).

My Favorite Lamp

Okay so I won't go into a long drawn out story about this lamp, it's somewhere else on my blog. I love this lamp, it was my Mammaws, she passed it on to me and I will pass it on to Sarah. It's very old and very special.

In All Your Glory

2006-02-17T14:52:00.000-05:00

Kristine said this week is about who you really are. So she has us delving deep into the areas unvisited by any other but ourselves...

Under My Bed

Okay this one was a little harder for me since we have a pedestal waterbed. It sits up high, but I do have small cabinets at the foot of each side, so that's what you'll get...

One side has a tool box with my hot glue gun and silk flowers in case I feel creative, curtains and who knows what else. The other side has the baby blankets that I refuse to let go of just yet. Believe me this is a very very small percentage of what I originally had.

My Stereo

This seems to be a common phenomena, I don't have a stereo. I have been looking at the little boombox cd players at WalMarts to put in the kitchen, but haven't bought one yet. If I'm listening to music it's usually from the TV, we have (and I think pretty much everyone does now) channels where we can select what kind of music we want to listen to. Then we have the "OnDemand" channels where we can watch the videos too.

Last, but not least...
My Pots and Pans

The green set we bought when we got our first apartment 11 years ago and they show it. There's very little teflon inside anymore (thanks Terry), you know you aren't supposed to use metal in those things. Then a few years ago Terry's mom must have felt sorry for me and bought me a new set, the blue ones. Now eventually I will have a set of copper bottom ones, Terry's grandma had a set and I absolutely loved them, but that's just one of those someday things. I also have 2 huge stock pots and have no idea where that glass skillet came from. It's just kinda followed us around over the years.

So there you have it, more up close and personal. See ya'll next week!!

What is up with this?

2006-02-16T17:04:00.000-05:00

Okay, so hell no, this isn't mine! Thank the Lord above! So anyways, it seems everyone is pregnant. My best friend is pregnant and due in July. My brother's (rofl) girlfriend is pregnant and also due in July. Then I just find out a girl I used to be friends with just found out she's pregnant also. Jeesh, it must be in the water. Yeah I had the itch for another baby a couple of months ago, but you know what? There's no way. Not only did I sever my baby making ability, but I've come to realize, I don't want another baby. My youngest will start preschool next year and shortly (if all goes right) I will be diaper free. I seriously have no desire to have another baby.

So anyways this other girl and her husband has been trying forever to have another baby. They have gone through fertility treatments, and haven't been successful. They have 4 boys, 3 of which are triplets and have talked forever about having just one more. I'm happy for them, I hope all goes well.

Cameras, Flashes and Lenses, OH MY!

So I'm definitely looking for another lense or 2, but can't make up my mind. I know 1 lense for sure, but can't decide on the other. Then I thought well, if I can get some answers about the lense and I decide I don't need it, maybe I'll get a slave flash. I don't know, it's all kinda confusing to me. I know if I go into the store undecided I'll get some jerk off that'll say I need something that I don't, then I'm going to be pissed because I got ripped off.

Okay well I'm off to Kmarts to try to find a cheap book shelf and get my room clean. Terry said I had until Friday night or he was going to scoop everything up and throw it away... LOL

Happy Valentine's Day

2006-02-14T22:58:00.000-05:00

So this is what I did Valentine's Day. As pseudo class parent I helped throw together a dance/party for 174 preschoolers. They had a blast, we had a ring toss donated, a bean bag throw and a cake walk. I thought it went very well and the other parents seemed pleased. There was only one mom who was a total witch about it and get this, SHE'S THE ONE WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO BE IN CHARGE... Yeah, the parents committee tried for 3 weeks to get ahold of her to get this party together, after all it was her idea and she wouldn't return the calls. So over the 3 weeks we planned and got everything together and she shows up to the parents meeting the day of and bitches about how she did it all by herself and had no help what-so-ever and it was just all a big mess. I really do not like this woman, neither do the other parents, so I am plotting to overthrow the government and impeach her... Okay so it won't be so dramatic, but I have been asked way before this incident by our Family Service Worker to take over the parents committee. So I guess I will. The most important thing is the kids enjoyed it, they had so much fun running around playing and dancing. Ladies, I think we did a bang up job throwing this together and thank you to the great hubbies who volunteered their time too!

After the dance Aunt Lori and I went off to Lowe's to "get Uncle Mike" his Valentine's gift, or so Terry thought. I had planned to get Terry a grill, he's always wanted a good one and it's about time he had one. So when Lori and I get back we're about a block away and I call him to tell him we need help unloading this thing and that Lori and I are going to put it together in the middle of our livingroom so that Mike doesn't see it. He gets all pissy and complains because he just started this game and was doing good. SO I moaned and whined about it and he ended up coming out, all huffy mind you. Lori is in the back of the truck apologizing profusely for bugging him, as I'm telling him to drop his attitude and Happy Valentine's day. Jeesh, I know it took a good 5 minutes for him to realize what I was saying. So now he's all excited about grilling out, I offered to put it together for him, but he screeched out something that sounded like don't touch it, not sure on that yet though...

So hope everyone had a wonderful Valentine's Day!!

2006-02-13T14:22:00.000-05:00

This week it's all about love. So without further ado, I'll get started...

What I love most about my home...

It's mine. No more tossing money out the window to some slum lord that won't fix anything. No more worrying about if that hole in the wall is going to cost me the WHOLE deposit. No more wondering if you're going to have to move in a year. It's mine. I can paint without asking, I can do anything to the house I want to and I love it. Now to just do it...

What I love least about my home...

What is this? Who decorated this house? There is hideous wallpaper in the bathroom and the linoleum is just as bad in there. There is paneling throughout. Just gotta LOVE the paneling. Before we even moved our bedroom furniture in (a waterbed is to hard to move again to paint) we used Kilz and painted the bedroom. The livingroom still has paneling and I keep saying I'm going to paint in there one day, just haven't done it yet. However the bathroom will be done and done soon.

Last but not least...

What I love most about myself

Right now I can't think of anything positive about myself. Okay well I figured I could love the fact that I have beautiful children and I could upload a picture of them , but I am to impatient to sit here for an hour while blogger screws up and the picture doesn't load.

SO anyways, I played and happy SPF to all!

Manipulating

2006-02-09T17:01:00.000-05:00

So I was pondering what to post today and thought it would just be a check in post. The kind where you say I'm still alive, the kids aren't tied up and the hubby hasn't been buried yet... But the phone rang and dumbass me answered it. It was Vicki... I really don't mind her calling, but hell she monopolized my entire blogging time and then bitched at me for not updating my blog. See wench, I told you I'd tell!! Did I tell you what I saw at Wal Mart today? Okay I won't then, maybe I'll get it for the baby. You know it's going to be a boy, not to mention it's going to be 2 boys and even though they have done an ultra sound one is just hiding in the back ground. Don't believe me, just ask Susan, she'll tell you. That would probably be the reason why you haven't felt a lot of movement, because there's not a lot of room in there for them both.

Isn't that just the cutest little ticker thing? Just check back periodically and watch it update itself.

So we're supposed to go to the store tonight and the kids are already making me nuts. They don't listen very well. We'll see how it goes.

So I'm off to round up heatherns and load them into the van. See ya tomorrow... If my time isn't monopolized... AGAIN.

Games People Play

2006-02-03T13:30:00.000-05:00

This SPF was a little more difficult for me. Growing up we played card games all of the time, but now as a family we don't do much of anything. So on that note, I am going to search my memory for some games...

Games I Played

Okay so that totally sucked. I had something typed here and it's gone... Oh well. The games I played were mean. We would tell my little brother we were playing hide and seek, then he would hide and we would leave him there. Poor kid would sit there for hours. I wonder if that had anything to do with how he turned out...

It didn't occur to me until I read someone else's blog that I could list volleyball... Duh! I played for 4 years, 2 years junior high and 2 years senior high. Out of those 4 years I was captain and co captain. I absolutely loved playing, but ended up on my knees (get your minds out of the gutter) one to many times and ended my playing streak. I also played other sports, basketball, soccer, pretty much ran the gambit.

My Family Game

I can't say this is really a family game, but I do take time here and there to play it with little Terry and sometimes Sarah or Cody will pick up the controller and try. Big Terry and I play this every Sunday and Tuesday night, although this last Tuesday he pulled and ahem (excuse me) stupid move. He got mad and logged off because he was killed with a grenade, but oh well, we had had a really bad night.

Game night is something that I am setting as one of my goals to improve my relationship with my children even if big Terry doesn't participate. It will be fun to see how it turns out.

My Game

Other than playing SOCOM3 and Battlefield2, I really don't have a game. I do play a lot on POGO, but nothing special.

I will check everyone's blogs out tomorrow, I'm going out tonight and have to hurry to clean the house and get all gussied up. **HUGS**

An Edit To Add...

2006-02-01T14:22:00.000-05:00

I wanted to edit my last post, but thought I would just add instead...

Terry and I love each other very much and neither of us would do anything to hurt the other. We've been hitting some bumps in the road lately do to actions from both of us. When we hit these bumps our reactions are completely different. I tend to be mouthy and fly into a rage and can become unbearable. Terry tends to deal with it by voicing his concerns, which in turn sends me off into a tangent.

Last night I was humiliated, whether intentional or not. I addressed it, for once in a very quiet honest manner. Concerns were voiced, quietly I might add, which ended in Terry telling me he "thinks this relationship is over".

Terry has always been very good to me, I won't deny that. He has never abused me. We have a history together that most marriages, relationships, what have you, have not survived. I do see us growing old together, but not if I don't get the help I need. I know I have issues from growing up, from the last 13 years of my life, that I need to address and heal. Some, well most, I thought I had dealt with, but a very close friend of mine pointed out I haven't and I know deep down I haven't. I need to start this process now or not only will I ruin my marriage, but I'll ruin my children as well. I'm handing this over to my highest authority, God, and I know he will carry me.

regarding my post this morning, I was, and still am, very raw emotionally. I needed to see my thoughts in letters instead of the jumbled mess in my head. I will be okay, my marriage will stand through this test, and in the end my children will thank me for seeking the help I need.

Everyone of you have been an inspiration to me, and I hope that you will not pass judgment on me through this process. I just think that last night I finally hit rock bottom and I am looking up now fighting to keep that light shining. I need that light to see through to where I can be whole. Where I can be a good wife, parent, friend and person.

I think I finally did it...

2006-02-01T07:57:00.000-05:00

I think I finally landed myself a divorce. I mean I guess it's been in the making for a while now, but last night I heard the words "This relationship is over". Have you ever had something echo so loud in your ears they rang afterwards? Mine are still ringing. I'll admit, I didn't sleep much at all last night, trying to stay on your side of the bed is hard. I'm not sure how I'm gonna fight it, I don't have any money and haven't worked in five years. I'm not sure how I would support 4 children either. How do you handle a mortgage, utility bills, groceries, childcare and everything that goes with it without a job? I'm going to try to fit in somewhere going to a temporary service to at least get started with something, I know how much I need to bring home to survive a month, but that was also before factoring in childcare expenses. Heck that's even if I would end up with the house and kids. I text messaged him earlier to ask him how he wanted to do this, but he keeps saying pull your head out of your ass. Mine may be stuck there at times, but I'm not the only one who has issues with lodging. He hates texting back and forth, but one I don't have a voice and two I don't want to talk to him right now. I'm trying not to let him see me cry. I don't want him to know how scared I am of having to do this on my own. I haven't been alone in almost 14 years. And before, I always thought if anything ever happened I could go home, but Mammaw's gone now. So how do you pick up and start over again? Do I stay here or do I move? I don't even want to think about furniture. If I were to get to keep the kids, do I get to keep their beds or do I have to let him have them since his mom is the one that gave them to us (with the exception of one)? What about the kids? How are they going to deal with this? What do I say to them? How do I explain to them I couldn't keep it together?

God, I don't ask for much, I never have, but if you are listening, please help me be strong, for the kids and for myself.

Weekend Funnies

2006-01-30T13:51:00.000-05:00

"Welfare"

A man walked into the local welfare office, marched straight up to the
counter and said, "Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd
REALLY rather have a job."

The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her sexual urges and excesses. You'll have a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting salary is $200,000 a year".

The applicant said, "You're bull shittin' me!"

The social worker responded, "Yeah, well, you started it."

I absolutely love this one...

Mothers

Mrs. Gonzalez comes to visit her son Jose for dinner. Jose lives with a female roommate, Maria. During the course of the meal, Mama can't help but notice how pretty Jose's roommate is. She had long been suspicious of the relationship between the two, and this made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between her son, Jose and his roommate than meets the eye. Reading his Mom's thoughts, Jose volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Mama, Maria and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Maria comes to Jose saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don't suppose she took it, do you?" "Well, I doubt it, but I'll e-mail her, just to be sure." So he sends his Mom an email:

Dear Mama,

I'm not saying that you took the sugar bowl from my house, and I'm not saying that you didn't take it.

But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

Love, Jose

Several days later, Jose receives an email response from his Mama:
Mijo,

I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Maria, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with her.

But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the sugar bowl by now.

Love, Mama

MORAL: Never lie to your Mama

Shake It Off...

2006-01-27T15:49:00.000-05:00

My Toys

I could have gone with my camera too, or I could have done my scrapbooking stuff. I figured I'd give something a little different, just for a change of pace.

Terry and his mom get me a Barbie every Christmas and sometimes Terry will sneak one in for Valentine's or Sweetest day. I like them and I know they serve no other purpose, but to collect dust. Aren't they pretty though? I have 2 huge boxes in the basement of them, there's no where to put them here. Oh well, they are still pretty. Sarah can't wait to get her hands on them... :)

My Secret

Make up. I have it. I use it. I hate it. If I don't have to wear it I don't. If you see me with it on, I don't mean it. So there's my big bad secret...

My Eyes

Kristine said your eyes are the windows to your soul. I agree with this. They can make or break your smile. I can always tell a true smile by looking at the eyes. So without further ado...

Disclaimer: Even more than putting on makeup, I hate having pictures taken of me. So this is as close to a picture as you get.

Jesus Take the Wheel

2006-01-27T14:43:00.000-05:00

I know at some time or another one of us posts lyrics that really touch us deep in our hearts. Goofy me gets all teary eyed everytime I hear it. Maybe it's because I know the song... I mean I've lived it. I know the anxiety, I think we all do. So here you have it...

She was driving last Friday on her way to Cincinnati
On a snow white Christmas Eve
Going home to see her Mama and her Daddy with the baby in the backseat
Fifty miles to go and she was running low on faith and gasoline
It would been a long hard year
She had a lot on her mind and she didn't pay attention
She was going way to fast
Before she knew it she was spinning on a thin black sheet of glass
She saw both their lives flash before her eyes
She didn't even have time to cry
She was sooo scared
She threw her hands up in the air

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this all on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel

It was still getting colder when she made it to the shoulder
And the car came to a stop
She cried when she saw that baby in the backseat sleeping like a rock
And for the first time in a long time
She bowed her head to pray
She said I'm sorry for the way
I've been living my life
I know I've got to change
So from now on tonight

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this all my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on

Oh, Jesus take the wheel
Oh, I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
Save me from this road I'm on
From this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel
Oh, take it, take it from me
Oh, why, oh

OMG!!

2006-01-26T11:04:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it! I finally found someone who can explain my camera to me in layman speak! I have done so much research trying to find something that I could understand to no avail. Then one day I'm cruising through the photography section of 2Peas and ran across The Steph. Now the Steph goes back to a board we used to play on called the unScrappables. We used to have so much fun there. We were the board where you could say what you wanted and no one cared. We didn't follow the rules. We had sexy signature lines and seemed pretty tight. I'm not quite sure what happened, it kinda died off real quick, then the board was gone, but hey it was a blast while it lasted.

So anyways I figured today after I drop the boys off at school, I'd take my camera and try out the lessons Steph has been posting. Did I mention how much I love Steph? Man, she is the bomb! I'll post some of my experiments later.

Oh yeah... Free the Steph!

So not to much going on here lately. Cody and Terry almost got me in trouble with children services. Okay so really it was Cody and his teacher. Cody went in to school last week with what looked like rope burns on the inside bends of his arms. When the teacher noticed it and asked him about it, he said Terry had wrapped him up in his blanket. Well she translated it to Terry had tied him up with his blanket. SO we get everyone home and start questioning them. Cody keeps saying the same thing, Terry "wrapped" him up in his blanket, which Terry is vehemently denying. We send Cody upstairs to get his blanket and show us what he is talking about and he drags down his huge comforter and wraps it around his whole body like you would if you were cold. The only thing that we can figure out is... They are boys and they like to hang from the rails of the bunk bed, which would coincide with where the marks were on his arms. I relayed this to the teacher and reminded her that next time she should let me know the "actual" words instead of her version. Unfortunately this teacher is sick and has left. She really loved the kids and I know she had Cody's best interest at heart. I spent the weekend making her a scrapbook of Cody's class, she cried. She actually made a few of us parents cry too. Also if I had told the Family Service Worker about his arms before hand then things wouldn't have progressed any further, but honestly it had slipped my mind. He had come down with long sleeves that morning and I had forgotten.

Alright all, there you have it in a nut shell and I am off to sandblast the funk off of my body. *HUGS*

Jeesh...

2006-01-20T15:40:00.000-05:00

Okay so how hard is it for some one to understand this... Part time childcare is $50. Part time is considered anything under 30 hours. So if you call off from your job on Monday and you decide to let Mom keep your child another day this week, I still get paid $50. If I call you and say, for what ever reason, I can't keep your child, then I will adjust the fee as applicable.

I've been going through this with the girl I babysit for for the last 4 weeks and it bugs me to no end. Every week I get a call asking me how much she owes me for the week. $50. Period. But he wasn't there on such and such day and I stayed home this day... $50. What if I take vacation? If you let me know in advance, I'm only asking for a week in advance (daycares ask for at least 2 weeks and at most you have to earn that), then I won't ask that you pay me. I was clear from the beginning with her that part time was $50 a week and full time is $75 and that is per child. Over Christmas break I had both of her boys. The first week she only paid me $60, I only had the oldest boy 1 day that week and let it go. The next week they were both off all week and she only paid me $80. I let that go to because she had Monday and Friday off. The little boy I keep everyday goes to preschool with mine so they are gone for 3 1/2 hours a day, so with actual time he is here I should be charging $75 a week. Mom gets off work at 4, but usually doesn't show up until 6 or 6:30 to pick him up, no explanation, no call. I'm really not the bitch I come off to be, but if you aren't going to pick your child up after work then call. If you aren't going to call, then don't call me weekly and say he wasn't there on this day or that so why do I have to pay.

So on the up side of all of this, Mom is really funny and sweet. I love hearing her talk. Her boys are boys through and through. They aren't bad, misdirected maybe, but not bad. Her oldest and I had a rough first couple of days, but we ironed it out and we're fine. I can't wait until it warms up more and we can all go to the park and such, I know a majority of the acting out is because they are inside all day. SO watch out spring, here we come!

Wake Up!

2006-01-20T12:53:00.000-05:00

My Lotions

I love my lotions and have an issue, if I'm out and have the money, of not buying if I like it. I keep saying to myself I'm going to go through all of my perfumes and lotions and start getting rid of what I don't use. Yeah right, as if that will ever happen.

My Towels

I hate my towels. Most are hand-me-downs or irregulars. I have a ton of beach towels and EVERYBODY thinks they need to use these instead of the others.

Now my plan is is to retire those icky things to the garage and get these...

That way I actually have an appealing, matching set of towels.

My Toothbrush

My toothbrush is sacred. That means I don't like for anyone to touch it, look at it, breath in it's direction and so on. I now keep my toothbrush in a basket that I can carry out of the bathroom because someone always steals it, which means I barely get it broken in and have to replace it. Generally it's one of the kids taking it upstairs to do whatever they feel they need to do with it or Terry using it because the kids have stolen his. STAY OFF OF MY BRUSH!! So anyways my toothbrush gets replaced about once a month and not because of me. She's brand new, still a little on the stiff side, but she's untouched by any other accept for me.

There you have it Happy SPF!!

The Hatfields and McCoys

2006-01-18T10:02:00.000-05:00

SO we have been in our house for 2 years now (yay us!) and we stay in our own yard and try not to bother anyone, I mean who wants to be known as the "assholes next door"? Maybe a month after we moved in I was outside with the kids playing when my neighbor approached me and introduced herself and her daughter. I thought cool, she was around my age and her daughter was in the same age range of my 4. This started off as a great neighborly relationship.

Fast forward a couple of months... My God! It's 6 in the morning and she's out there for the 3rd time this week mowing her grass! I'm all about a nice yard (even though mine looks slightly ratty because of the dog), but at 6 in the morning? I mean she is out here 3 times a week "grooming" her yard. I'm lucky if my yard gets mowed once a week. Her daughter won't come in the yard because I refuse to let her scream in her high pitch scream at the top of her lungs on my porch when the dog runs by, so they run and play on the sidewalk while we sit there and gossip about the other neighbors. Her daughter often runs up in the grass so the others can't get her because she knows that NO ONE is allowed to step on her precious grass.

Fast forward some more... We sat out here on her porch more than a few times drinking beers and watching the kids play. I know we don't run in the same group, but so far we have gotten along pretty well and LOVE to discuss what we think may be going on at others houses around us. I want to describe her and her hubby as being Goth, but I don't think that's quite right. Punk? Yeah I think that's it. It just seems we mesh well together.

Fast forward to now. I don't know what the hell happened, but sometime over the summer she changed. All of a sudden neighborly hellos were met with a nose in the air. If my kids would say hi to her daughter, she would reply with some snotty kid comment. So anyways things have been brewing away. Parking, the yards, the kids and so on. SO she comes to me a couple of weeks ago and says I've parked to far forward and her husband won't be able to park in front of their house and this is an inconvenience and could I move my van back some. I told I would, but also let her know that the reason my van was where it was, was because when she raked all of the leaves up and put them in front of my house, it rained, they froze and now I couldn't get the van backed up because I was stuck on them, but I would come out and try to move it. I got it moved, I ended up having to throw a towel under the tire to get traction. See, we had this unspoken agreement and it had gone well, I didn't park in her spots and vice versa. If we had company we made sure they didn't take up each others spots. This was working well until recently and it wasn't me, it was her. Friday night I had to run out to the store and I realized after I left I had left the checkbook on the table so I went back. As I was pulling up she was backing her car into my spot because her other neighbor was in her other spot. I went ahead and went to the store and when I came back I had no where to park. So I politely went up to her door and knocked. In my sweetest voice (which was hard because I was pissed) I asked her to move because she was in my spot and I had groceries and it was an inconvenience (there's that word again) for me to have to park down the street or whatever. When she told me no, the switch flipped from sweet to bitch instantly. I did however remain calm. I told her I had always made it a point to abide by our unspoken agreement about the parking and I couldn't understand why she wasn't, she through the "inconvenient" word out again, a few times I might add. She said she couldn't understand why I was getting so upset over the parking, after all, I could always park in my rundown garage that is full. She could also park in the back of her house in the parking area, but we won't go there. Anyhow it ended up with me telling her to not ever ask me to move again and to please apologize to her husband when he comes home and doesn't have a parking spot and I parked in front of her house. I know, street parking is public parking, but we all at some point try to please our neighbors and try to not intentionally cause problems. I mean I don't know about her, but I don't plan on moving for at least another 5-10 years and I hate for things to be this way. Jeesh, our kids go to school together, we're going to see each other pretty much on a daily basis, but oh well, my dreams of having a decent relationship with my neighbor have been shattered. So this brings me to my closing. Last night Terry cam in and says "Did you see what they have done?" Who? "The neighbors..." No, to be quite honest, I haven't paid any attention to them today. "They redid the fence in the back so he would have a spot to park in." So did we win? Was there even a winner in this situation? I mean I knew long ago we would never live up to her standards. Our kids run around with dirty faces all day and hers borders on OCD with washing her hands. I know there's nothing wrong with cleanliness, but there's a point where you have to draw the line. Kids get dirty, you deal with it and give them baths at night. Hopefully this will be the end to a stupid feud over stupid parking, I know we'll never speak again, but oh well, you win some and you lose some.

Friday the 13thish

2006-01-13T20:24:00.000-05:00

Lucky or unLucky

This is this weeks Stuff portrait Friday topic.

Something You Are Afraid Of

The Courtney Campbell Causeway. This was taken from the St Petersburg side. I am afraid of water being on both sides of me, as in bridges, CAUSEWAYS, anything of the like. Mainly because of the fear of going over the edge. I cannot drive across the causeway, and I have trouble going across bridges. I know bridges are a staple to us for transportation, so I have to deal with one at some point or another. The shorter the better. Most bridges I can deal with, but I have to be on the inside lane. I know, pretty stupid. There is only one bridge I absolutely refuse to go over and will go the extra 60 or so miles out of my way to keep from crossing it, the Sunshine Skyway Bridge IN Florida. It's way to long and way to high.

Your Lucky Charm

This has hung from my sun visor in my car(s) for the last 6 years. I can't remember where it came from, but it has served as my "lucky charm" for whatever reason. When I've switched vehicles, it has always gone with me. Not to mention it's kinda pretty.

Something Friday the 13thish

Okay Kristine said to be creative with this one. Try as I might I couldn't come up with anything. I am not feeling very creative right now. I had all kinds of ideas, but couldn't find pictures to go with them. I thought of a perpetual pregnancy, although I think most feel that way. I thought of my camera being broken, that would be a nightmare to most of us. I thought of a few other things, but like I said, just not feeling creative tonight.

See ya all on the flip side.

Just Couldn't Resist It...

2006-01-09T14:28:00.000-05:00

After a lot of thought, I decided to remove this post. No need to give a troll any satisfaction.

SPF Friday

2006-01-07T01:41:00.000-05:00

This week the subject is Before and After. I had plenty of ideas on what to do, but I won't get in front of the camera, plus I don't have a wide angle lense yet. So I went kinda cheesey with mine...

Before

This is what I started with for my digi camera. It took decent pictures, so I can't complain about that, but like any other woman, I wanted bigger...

After

Sorry guys, we lie, sometimes bigger is better. No offense, but it's not always how you work it. There are a few out there who know how to work it and have wonderful results, but they are few and far between.

I think at this given time my camera is my favorite. I think if I was being mugged, I'd try to trade one of the kids before giving up my camera. After all, the camera doesn't make a mess. It does, however, like to be cuddled afterwards.

Three Years Now...

2006-01-02T16:53:00.000-05:00

It was 3 years ago today I woke up to an email to call John. He had at some point conveniently lost my number. I knew it couldn't be good, the only time he ever called me were when things were going wrong and I knew this time wouldn't be any different. I called and he gave me the news that had my whole world screeching to a stop... You were gone.

For the first time ever in my life I think I heard my heart break. What was I supposed to do? How was I supposed to act? You weren't here to talk me through it. Images of my childhood, of growing up, of you holding my babies for the first time, ran through my head like an old 8mm movie in slow motion. I remembered things I had forgotten, I remembered things I had never remembered before. I remembered the summers on the lake, the dance recitals where you would work for what seemed like hours on my hair so it was perfect. I remembered you riding the bus with me to school for a whole week to make sure I didn't cut. I remember you fighting for me when I was right and helping me to learn when I was wrong. You were my solid ground, my rock. Even though I was married and had my own little household, you still made me whole.

I didn't get to see you those last couple of months and it killed me, but after the news it was worse. I felt like I had abandoned you, had left you. I just wanted you to know I called often, I spoke with your nurses and I did what I could. John had moved you 4 hours away and my van never would have made it. I still blame myself though, there were other ways to get to you. I am so sorry. I just wanted you to know that.

Today, that little munchkin on your lap crawled out on the porch roof. Your namesake, Sarah Evelyn, helped her baby brother in the bathroom go potty. Cody, well he's just Cody, shy as always and always has a smile. You didn't get to meet Ian. I'm not even sure if you knew I was pregnant again. I know I told you, but at the time things weren't registering with you. Ian is an angel... Well he can be... Okay he's meaner than snake spit.

Did I ever tell you when we would leave the house, to come home, I would cry? I don't think I ever did. Terry never understood why. I would cry because I was always afraid that that would be the last time I would see you. I was always afraid of losing you. I knew eventually it would be your time, I just hoped it would never happen. I know, selfish wishing. I damn near had you for 29 years. You had already raised your children, you never thought you would be raising your children's children. You sacrificed your home, your health, your heart, all for me. You made sure I had the world at my feet, you gave me everything. You were my mentor and my tormenter. You made me who I am today. You made me tow the line and when I didn't you kicked my ass. You taught me to love unconditionally and you taught me to forgive. You told me labor would be hard, but the pain would be gone the second I looked into those sweet little eyes. You told me the hurt would always be there, but that it would heal. The only thing you didn't teach me was how to deal with losing you.

I still talk to you. I still ask you what you would do. I still tell you how much I miss and love you. I tell the kids about you and what you meant to me. I show them pictures and I tell them my stories. Terry and I talk about and laugh at some of our memories. Terry misses you to in his own way. I remember the night you met Terry, you told me he was a keeper. He was the only one you ever liked. I remember the talk we had when he broke my heart too, you told me he would change, it just took longer for boys to grow up. You taught me the world wasn't all bad. You taught me strength.

So anyways... I just wanted to let you know. I wanted you to know how much you mean to me and how much I miss you. I wanted to thank you for everything you gave me and for making me the woman I am now I wanted to thank you for teaching me individuality. I wanted to thank you for you.

I love you.

Two More Days

2006-01-02T16:23:00.000-05:00

Thank God! School starts back up Wednesday morning and I am having a huge party! Now don't get me wrong, I love my kids, but I am done. I am done with the fighting, I am done picking up toy after toy or stepping on the pieces. I am done with the backtalk (although this doesn't get very far), I am done with the constant whining for more kool-aid or lunch 15 minutes after the last drink or meal. I am just done. It's cool the first few days, you get to sleep in (or at least I do) and aren't in a rush to get 4 kids to different schools and back without forgetting one on the way. After that first few days though, I'd sacrifice my soul for school to start back up. I can't stress enough that I am not cut out for this "at home mom" stuff. Right now I am trying to grab whatever few minutes in my sanctuary in front of the computer that I can. This quiet spot won't last very long though, I'm sure someone will be in here in a few seconds. Yup, here she comes... Mommy can you open this? Yep and here he comes... Roman eyes and Russian hands... How am I gonna survive this?

So I hope everyone had a wonderful New Years. Terry and I got some movies and watched them. We really don't do to much for NYE. I tried to get a few people together last year, but either they cancelled for something better or called at the last minute and stayed home. This year we decided to just watch movies and eat Chinese. We called Chicago to let them know the ball drop hadn't changed and they should just keep partying through the hour. That was met with a huge (and loud) Happy New Year from an apartment of drunk individuals. It was kinda funny though, Terry heard them from across the room. Terry drank damn near a gallon of Jaegermeister to himself, I tried to get a buzz, but it wasn't happening for whatever reason. I gave that up and went back to my ice tea. I know we're boring... No fireworks here.

Alright, thought I would jump in and say hey... So HEY!! I'm off to start some domestic terror like dinner or something... Later!!

2005-12-30T17:17:00.000-05:00

Watching The Ball Drop

My New Years Resolutions

Hmmmm... Where do I start? Actually I only have 3 and I hope to stick them.

The first one is my weight. I think everyone says their resolution is weight related, but mine is becoming a health issue. I had to go to the store the other night and put on my "fat" jeans, that even on my worst days I had to wear a belt with, and they were tight. So at the store, out of curiosity, I stopped to have my blood pressure checked, 108/172. Not good. Ever since I was pregnant with Terry I've battled the blood pressure issue, but it was only this high at the end of my pregnancies. So in order to change this weight loss is a critical step. So my resolution is to use these at least 3 times a week...

I've been saying this for months, but now I'm going to put forth the effort to do this come hell or high water. I've been scrapbooking for a little over 3 years now and for the longest time religiously scrapped at least once a week, if not more. SO this brings me to resolution #2... Take one night a week to scrap at least 2 layouts...
Lastly... Terry bought me this super awesome camera, Canon Rebel XT, in October. Then for Christmas got me the zoom lense I so lusted for, and I don't know how to use either. I mean I've figured out some of the basics, but I want to really know them. I want to be able to take perfect pictures. I am so jealous of the pictures on some of the blogs I read, there are some super talented individuals out there. So my 3rd resolution is to learn to use my camera and lenses better.

My Favorite Picture of 2005

I love going home. Home to me is in Louisville, Ky. No matter how many times I go back, I have to go across the river and get this shot. The skyline to me is so beautiful. The city itself is beautiful, it's clean, the architecture is to die for and there is so much to do there. So here it is my favorite picture...

Something I'll be Glad to Leave Behind in 2005

This place is the source of many issues over the last 7 years. Terry busted his ass here and gave everything he had and they gave nothing. I blame them for a lot of our financial problems over the years. A majority of your companies give, at least, cost of living pay increases every year, they didn't. They always claimed mechanics didn't get raises. Whatever. There were some great people at Terry's location, but the company in general sucked. I was so glad when he called and said he had had it and could he quit. So, hats off to you Gateway, may you struggle to keep your doors open with your half assed mechanics and loss of customers that contact Terry on a daily basis to work on their cars. Your loss, our gain. Should have treated him better...

What did everyone get?

2005-12-28T19:34:00.000-05:00

Let's see The kids got a lot of stuff... Bratz Babiez and stuff to go with them, Magnetix, Rescue heroes, books, there was a Dora kitchen set for Ian, Cody loved his bike and a few other things that I can't think of right now. Big Terry had said he wanted a power tool set and he got it with a leveler...

He had gone out and bought Ian a "special" gift...

He said he's going to get him a horn or bell to go with it, I told him he'd die first.

He went shopping with his buddy Zeke Friday night and kept calling asking all of these camera questions, Vanessa got a new digi for Christmas.

Here's what I got...

Wooohoooo!! I don't have to wait until tax time to get my zoom lense!! Isn't he great! I so love it, now I won't have to be in the front row to get good pictures of the kids during recitals! And Cinderella? I love, love, love Cinderella! She has always, since I can remember, been my favorite. I saw her a couple of months ago when I was at the mall and almost snatched her up, but I knew Terry would have had a fit at that time had I done it, we had enough problems then. As usual (and I am far from complaining about it) his mom sent me a Holiday Barbie. She has bought me one every year since '92 when Terry and I started dating.

Now I can't wait until tax time. I want a wide angle lense and a docking station to print my pictures from and a couple of other camera related things. Well, I don't know about the docking station, I need to do more research on them. I want to be able to edit my pictures before printing them, but we'll see.

Over all Christmas was great this year. We all got what we wanted and everyone is happy. I hope you all had a great Christmas too!!

Christmas Eve

2005-12-28T19:05:00.000-05:00

For whatever reason I had a small Christmas here at home. Every year we run from house to house to house trying to make everyone else happy. This year we stayed home. I made a huge assed turkey and all the fixins' and invited my mom and dad, and Terry's dad and his girlfriend. There were several others that had been invited, but didn't show up for various reasons. I won't complain though, it was more relaxing without the crowd. My mom and dad came early so they could exchange their gifts with the kids and us...

Dinner and gifts went of without a hitch. The turkey, as usual, was to die for. I make an amazing turkey and will break my arm patting myself on the back. The kids got movies and hand knitted hats and scarves. I got scrapbooking stuff and Terry got a bottle of Jeagermeister and a huge sheet of rice crispy treats. Mom? I'm the drinker, not Terry... We got them gift cards to Red Lobster, their favorite restaurant. So everyone was happy and felt merry... Poor Merry... Okay I know, bad joke.

After everyone left we cleaned up, amazingly everything was cleaned up and I was able to take a nap, I knew I had a long couple of hours ahead of me. I woke up around midnite and had Terry help me drag up all of the kids' stuff so I could start wrapping... I hate wrapping! So 3 hours later, much cussing and several cigarettes later, I had a living room that looked like this...

After laying in bed, sleepless, for an hour and a half, I remembered I had a bag of books I had bought in the back of the van and had to run out to get them and divvy them up to who they went to. Finally after crawling back in bed I passed out, happy.

Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree...

2005-12-28T18:41:00.000-05:00

Woooaaaaa!! We are way late getting the tree up this year. I have, all of my life, had my tree up the day after Thanksgiving. This year was rough, with Terry and I fighting, and the depression I kept bouncing in and out of, I just couldn't motivate myself. Then there were the excuses... I want my dad to put in a new plug... Wait, so I can thread the lights in as you go... Then my "Screw this! I'll just rip the damned thing down and not have a tree this year!" temper tantrum. It sat like this...

for 2 days.

I started bitching about the tubs being in the livingroom, and the lights being spread all over the house and eventually it started coming together...

I think it turned out pretty good. I certainly got me in a better mood. It seemed a little more like Christmas to me then.

The following morning, Cody in all of his innocence (yeah right!) came down and asked where the presents were. He figured trees up presents should be here... Little does he know...

Christmas Concert 2005

2005-12-28T18:23:00.000-05:00

This year the kindergarten, first and second grades did their little recital. It was so cute. Of course I only had interest in the kindergarten. I took a few pictures...

Sarah is the little cutie in the bottom center with the plaid skirt and white turtleneck. If you can't see her very well, look at this, it's not the best but all I could do with my editor...

Great job baby! You did the little dances with your songs and sang your little heart out. You made me very proud!

I can't wait until tax time when I can buy that zoom lense, it will make things so much easier...

Christmas Pictures 2005

2005-12-28T17:36:00.000-05:00

So we all strive every year for that one picture that just knocks your socks off. Sometimes we do them ourselves other times we head off to let the professionals bare the burden. I generally do all of my pictures myself and think I do a pretty decent job. Now I know I am in no way near as good as most, but for myself and my family I am the greatest. So to start things off, I had what I wanted in mind for my backdrop and having the new camera wasn't quite sure how to get it. Picture this, dark blue backdrop with Christmas lights, but the cord can't show through, with all 4 kids smiling in unison. I set everything up and decide to do test shots so that I can set whatever setting that needs to be set in order to get this great picture... This is what I got.

Now mind you, this is after sitting in the floor moving and adjusting, reading and taking notes trying to get everything right. I took probably 200 pictures that day just trying to get it all set up.

Anyways I spent the entire week just trying to figure out this "triangle" that includes aperture, ISO, and something else that completely slips my mind, to no avail. I give up.

So Saturday night I dressed the kids in their white turtle necks, jeans and white socks (I made sure they were wearing the new white ones). I took the first few test shots...

They weren't to bad, but either the flash just totally washed them out or Ian wouldn't smile and they just didn't say "Christmas" to me. So I decided to add in some of the super-sized ornaments I had purchased just for this type of photo shoot...

Stoned?

Hungry?

Look at me, not Sarah...

Okay so at this point I am about to die. I can't get everyone to look at me at the same time. Can't get everyone to smile at the same time, Christ, I need a beer. Let's get the Christmas lights and string them across everyone and see how that looks, because nothing is shouting at me yet. I am doing all of the shouting, I know Terry is about to rip my head off. SO let's see how this looks...

No! No! No! Look at me! You'd of thunk they had never seen Christmas lights before!

Could everyone sit still please? I'm begging you, please sit still, all I want it one picture...

This must have been when Terry mooned them trying to get a laugh out of them all.

After 177 pictures, 2 nerve pills, a blasting migraine from the stress of the photo shoot and still no damn beer, I grabbed up my camera, went to the fridge grabbed the whole 6 pack, ran into my room, slammed the door and started looking through what I had. There was a lot of movement so almost all pictures had some kind of blur going on. I finally settled on this one...

This was the top of my list. It was the best out of them all. This is the one I out with Christmas cards. I hope next year is easier...

Just a Heads-up

2005-12-28T17:33:00.000-05:00

I'm am getting ready to do a major update on my blog. Things that I want here and just have either not had time to do them or was to depressed/manic or whatever else that may have plagued me at the time to do it. So if you stay with me through them all you are wonderful, if you don't.... You are still wonderful. Just bare with me.

SPF Cubed

2005-12-21T19:18:00.000-05:00

SPF Ho Ho Ho...
Love it Kristine! You are right, not often we can direct "Ho" towards anyone without a fight ensuing.

So anyways this weeks Stuff Portrait Friday is "Ho Cubed". And I've done my best, but I had to steal one picture from a store to do it.

Your Favorite Wrapped Present

So it's not wrapped. It won't be either. To hard. It is however by far my favorite present. My mother in law has promised Cody a bike for the last 2 years and everytime we mention going to buy one she says no, she's going this weekend to get one. It has always been this way and I don't have an excuse for why Cody still doesn't have a bike. So for Christmas he is getting a bike. I am so excited to see his little eyes light up when he sees it.

Something New You Added to Your Decorations

I got them both for Christmas last year. One from my step-brother in law and one from my mother in law. I actually like them both. I have to say the little carousel is one of my favorites, but don't tell my mother in law, I wouldn't want her to know.

You Christmas Cards

These are my cards. Not a whole lot, but I didn't get my cards out last year. They are going out tonight though.

So there you have it, my SPF stuff. Enjoy!!

SPF Friday on Monday

2005-12-19T20:59:00.000-05:00

This was, to me, one of the best Kristine!! It gave me a chance to use the macro setting on my camera and put some of my filters to work.

Something Green/Red

I just went ahead and put these together... Okay well they were together on their own, I was just to lazy (or manic) to find something else of the other color. The pictures turned out cool though...

Something You Decorate

This was a little harder for me because other than the tree nothing else really gets decorated. Because we don't have a mantle, and we don't have any shelves in the living room, I hang the stockings in the kitchen on the wonderful shelf hubby had made for me when we first moved in here. So here goes...

This was fun and I can't wait until mid week to see what's next!!

SO YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING?

2005-12-13T14:21:00.000-05:00

A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue.

A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

Butterflies taste with their feet.

Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds. Dogs only have about 10.

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

If the population of China walked past you, in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red lights.

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

The Peanut is one of the ingredients of dynamite .

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right.

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.

The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).

There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous

There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious."

There's no Betty Rubble in the Flintstones Chewables Vitamins.

Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest itself.

A Woman's Poem

2005-12-13T14:15:00.000-05:00

He didn't like the casserole

And he didn't like my cake.

My biscuits were too hard...

Not like his mother used to make.

I didn't perk the coffee right

He didn't like the stew,

I didn't mend his socks

The way his mother used to do.

I pondered for an answer

I was looking for a clue.

Then I turned around and smacked him...

Like his Mother used to do.

Happy to be with you

2005-12-09T15:01:00.000-05:00

Tattoo or Birthmark

Everytime I go to the Dr he checks this. He swears it's a mole, but it's listed in my baby book as my birthmark. I call it my 5 star mark. I'd do my tattoo, but it's so new that it's still a little rough and I think we'll wait on that.

Bumper Sticker

Don't have one, but if I did it would be one of these..

Something I keep Changing

Have to change them occasionally... Don't you?

Just for fun

2005-12-09T01:07:00.000-05:00

Five details about you:
1. I'm not really a red head
2. I am a very disorganized person
3. I'm over protective of my kids
4. I'm scared to go down to my basement
5. I can be very selfish
five details about your appearance right now:
1. I'm not wearing a bra (LOL)
2. I have on the same pajama shirt I wore to bed last night
3. My hair look unkempt
4. I'm barefoot
5. My new tattoo is a little scabby
five things you did yesterday:
1. Cry
2. Scream
3. Bought filter for humidifier
4. Played on Pogo until I couldn't keep my eyes open
5. Meditated
five memorable things you did in the past year:
1. Went to Chicago
2. Saw my brother for the first time in 3 years
3. Played at the pool with my babies
4. Had a wonderful surprise birthday party
5. Got my first "real" camera
five favorite musicians/singers:
1. Reba McEntire
2. Garth Brooks
3. Sheryl Crow
4. Bon Jovi
5. Martina McBride
five favorite movies:
1. Long Kiss Goodnight
2. Beauty and the Beast
3. Cinderella
4. Silence of the Lambs
5. The Green Mile
five things that make you happy:
1. A warm spring breeze
2. Ian's eyes when he first wake up
3. Yellow Roses
4. Laughter
5. Good friends
five things that impress you:
1. Intelligence
2. Photography
3. Manners
4. True friendship
5. Love
five things that don't impress you:
1. Ignorance
2. Racism
3. Macho men
4. Braggers
5. Mean people
five things you can't live without:
1. My computer
2. My camera
3. My cat
4. Scrapbook stuff
5. Internet

Let it snow...

2005-12-09T00:07:00.000-05:00

So I'm looking out my window at about 6 inches of snow. It's so pretty, just as long as I don't have to go out in it. They have already cancelled school for tomorrow, which means I'll have 6 kids running around my house, but hey I can use that time to start my Christmas cards, get my Christmas pictures taken, send them off to Wally World and get my tree upstairs. I'm trying to be positive here and keep in mind I have beer and nerve pills around here.

I know you are curious and I'm getting to it... I woke up in a fairly decent mood today. Yippee!! Made the day go faster. Didn't get anything done around the house or anything like that, but at least I wasn't so depressed. Terry brought me home all kinds of stuff to feed the kids tomorrow knowing I would not want to take them out to get anything, which was cool of him. I think because I have such a short fuse things sometimes seem worse than they really are. I really do love Terry, I think I'm just getting burned out on the at home issue. There's not a whole lot I can do about it right now, with his work schedule it makes it hard to work anywhere. And we don't want to approach the topic of childcare expenses. So I need to make the best of it. Maybe next year after Cody is in school full time I can get a part time job during the day and find a sitter for Ian. So please bare with me for the next 9 months of hell raising.

Christmas
I think this year we're going to have a small Christmas at home. We've invited my mom and dad, my brother, his girlfriend (I love her, she's so cool) and kids, his dad and just us. It will make it so much easier and a lot less stress. There is a possibility that my other brother and sister in law will be in town which would be great, I always love to see them. I know mom said they are trying to come home if he can get a leave before he ships off again. I still need to get a calendar together for my grandma for her Christmas gift, but haven't started on it yet. Actually I ordered a scrapbook calendar from Stampin Up, but haven't been over to my mom's yet to pick up my order. What ever I do I must borrow my mom's carpet cleaner before anyone steps foot into this house.

34 and counting
Terry will be 34 Saturday. HAHAHAHAHAHA!! I think Vicki and I are going to try to take him out for his birthday. Maybe I should get ahold of Lori and Mike (my aunt and uncle) and invite them too. Which reminds me.. BRB... Okay back, had to shoot an email off to Lori before I forgot. I wanted to throw a surprise party for him, but that didn't pan out, to many people going to be gone to Christmas functions and then next weekend is his company Christmas party. I'll call some of the guys at work and see if they want to join us, it could be fun. Maybe I can do it next year, have more time to plan and not so stressed.

I just thought I would update you all and let you know I am okay. I also wanted to thank you all for letting me get it out, sometimes that's all I need to do and I really don't have anyone to vent to anymore. Not saying I can't vent to Vicki or Lori, but I feel like I'm always bitching to them about something. Hugs and kisses to everyone. I'm outtie!! Night!!

Playing Games

2005-12-07T14:44:00.000-05:00

I guess to start I'm as usual in a bad mood. This isn't to say I started out in a bad mood, just that I've been put in one. You see, I asked Terry to go upstairs and make the kids clean up 1 or the 3 rooms. I go up this morning because we can't find one of the tennis shoes and what do I discover? Is it that hard? I mean I know the last thing I want to do is go up an stand over them to clean their rooms, but hey I'm the one who always does it. So once in a while I ask Terry to do it. SO I called him on his cell today and said something about it, I wasn't nasty about it, just said I was wondering why he hadn't done it. No comment. He wouldn't even acknowledge, that I had asked him and he hadn't done it. You know, it's stuff like this that I am over. I am so sick of asking for help and not getting it, then getting attitude because I'm pissed. Anyways, I left him alone, because he was being an ass and not answering his direct connect. As I was getting ready to go into Lowe's I tag him to let him know I was going to reschedule my entrance exam and not to worry about hurrying home, this was met with a barrage of questions. Wait a minute let me clarify that, I told him not to worry about tonight, he wants to know what I'm talking about, I said my appointment, what appointment, well if I have to explain it to you it doesn't matter anyways. This has been the entire subject matter for the last 2 days, how could he "forget". I get this answer from him "Quit playing fuc@ing games with me I'm tired of it!" Games? What games? I didn't think anywhere in that I was playing with him. So screw him. Almost in tears, I just cue down my phone and put it back in the van. I go about the rest of my errands, 2 hours last night looking for this stupid filter and 2 more hours today looking for it. I drop Cody and the little boy I watch off at school and head home. Mind you this entire time I have left the phone off. I come home and stupid me turns my phone back, my cousin like to text me during the day and the first thing I hear is "oh you decided to turn your phone back on", back off it went. See this is what I'm talking about, this kind of crap. Then he wonders why I get so pissy with him.

Maybe it's just me. I feel like here lately I've just gone downhill. I'm not happy. I haven't been happy for a while. I'm sick of being at home all of the time. My days are filled with Dora and Franklin. My nights are filled with dinner, baths and ongoing fights to go to bed. Last night little Terry was arguing with me about something and when I asked Terry to step in he told him to shut up so he wouldn't have to listen to me. WOW! What a way to convey respect. I told him if he would step up from the get go I wouldn't have to say something to him. I just can't do this anymore. My kids are always asking me why I'm upset and what do I say? It's not right to say your dad upset me, that's just not acceptable, so what do I say? Anyways this paragraph is supposed to be about me slowly becoming uber bitch. I just wish I could get around this.

Anyways, someone has to go monitor the kids doing their chores, I guess I'll bounce at now. Pray tomorrow I wake up with a smile and have a great day. I so need one right now.

Guess What...

2005-12-06T17:04:00.000-05:00

Last night I had an appointment with ITT Tech. I know most of you have heard of them, they are all over the place. Anyways I enrolled for a 2 year associates in Computer networking Services. I have to do something. I want so bad to go back to work, but no one wants to pay what I need to put 4 kids in childcare and my family isn't very forthcoming in helping me out. I go tomorrow night to do my entrance exam and financial aid stuff. With our income and being a family of 6 I should at least get half of it paid for. I am so excited about this. Wish me luck!!

Christmas Tree

So I guess everyone has their trees up? Well I don't. This is the first year in my life, 31 years, that the tree wasn't up right after Thanksgiving. It's weird and you would think instead of being here on the computer I could be off putting up my tree. I'll get to it in the next couple of days... hopefully. I did get out the pretty snow globe and carousel that my grandmother gave me. They are sitting on the TV stand.
I just need to get the kids pictures done and then that will clear out the spot I have for the tree.

Mood Swings

I'm having one right now. I was in a bad mood for no reason earlier today. Was depressed for part of the day, swung into a good mood and am slowly getting depressed again. I hate this. I can't wait until Terry's insurance kicks in and I can switch to a real Dr. I mean I'm sure Dr S is real, but he's such a flake. You go into his office, he asks you "What do you want?" writes out the prescription, and then tells you the session is over. Then he bills your insurance for an hour. Whatever, I don't like talking to you anyways. When he does talk to you you feel like you are on the stand and the prosecutor is trying to prove you are guilty.

Just In General

I killed the biggest spider I've ever seen, it was peeking out at me from the bottom of my desk. Ewwwwwwww! Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! They make my skin crawl.

I can't wait until this little boy I babysit goes home, I want a cigarette. He has asthma and I won't smoke when he's here. I also make it a conscious effort that my house doesn't smell like smoke. So far from what I've heard I do a great job of it.

I got another tattoo. My brother did this one and did a wonderful job. This bitch hurts like hell. It's in the middle of my lower back. I was actually feeling nauseous from the pain while he was doing it. I didn't feel that way until there at the end, but I know I couldn't have taken much more. I'll get a picture of it up in the next day or 2.

Oh well, I need to go beat kids and make them clean and quit fighting, so I will check you all later. I'm out!

SPF CSI Style

2005-12-02T16:43:00.000-05:00

Solve This...

The Victim:

Name: Sarah Evelyn
Age: 6
Location: Undisclosed at this time

The Crime Scene

The Weapon Used

Motive

While twirling around carefree and innocently the victim had been instructed to stop. When she didn't stop she fell into the arm of the couch causing the camera case (shown in crime scene photograph) to fall over dropping camera onto the floor. Thus causing suspect to lash out in anger. It appears victim had the shit strangled out of them.

Let's Play

2005-12-01T18:57:00.000-05:00

Here's something I haven't done in a long time a MeMe. Just to refresh everyone's memory a meme n: is an idea that is shared and passed from blog to blog, like a question posted in one blog and answered in many other blogs.

So here's one I stole from another blog...

I am not: stay at home mom material
I hurt: when someone is mean to me
I love: being out an away
I hate: ignorant people
I crave: peppermints
I regret: not going to college
I cry: when I hurt
I care: way too much about what everyone thinks of me
I will always: be insecure
I long to: be able to ignore what others are thinking of me
I feel alone: most of the time
I listen: to others to much and let it affect me
I hide: how much I hurt sometimes
I drive: back and forth to school everyday
I sing: all the time
I dance: when I'm drunk
I write: lists of things that need to be done, but never end up doing them
I breathe: when I get those few moments by myself
I miss: having a baby around the house
I feel: today? depressed
I know: that someday things will look better
I say: to many cuss words
I dream: of living in a big house in the country
I sleep: on the right side of the bed
I wonder: if there really is a government conspiracy
I want: be like I was when Terry and I first met
I worry: TOO MUCH
I have: a headache right now
I need: to be understood and accepted for who I am
I am: Done now.

I'm tagging Kristine at Random and Odd...

In General

2005-12-01T14:34:00.000-05:00

So I didn't do SPF last week, just wasn't feeling the spirit of the holiday. Spent the weekend being pissy, I do this well you know. I was so thankful Monday when school started back up, I thought I was going to die. Terry took little Terry with him to work on Friday and Saturday which was cool, he enjoyed it. Saturday after work Terry was supposed to go work on a car with a friend of his, but ended up calling me to tell me he was going to go out driving around for a couple of hours, which turned into 1AM. He was gone again most of Sunday putting a fuel pump in my cousins car, which is cool, I asked him to.

I don't know here in the last couple of weeks it's just been one thing after another between us. I know I'm not the easiest person to get along with, but give me a break, I'm home all day long alone with 5 kids now and for him to be gone at night too is just to much. No matter what I say though I am wrong, which then flips the pissy switch, which then pisses him off because I'm being snippy. I think I need to take a weekend and go to Louisville. I need to think and I can't think with kids climbing all over me and a husband calling me a lesbian because I'm not hopping in the sack with him every night. I mean that's what it is isn't it? I must be a lesbian, that has to be why I'm not in the mood for sex, right? Just ask Terry he knows, he tells me this just about every night. I mean it wouldn't have anything to do with being tired, or depressed, or self conscious, or anything else for that matter. OR MAYBE THE FACT YOU ARE NEVER FUCKING HOME! When you are home you sleep. I am just seriously having issues with everything right now. I am just so tired of fighting with him and the kids. To get any help from any one I have to go into fits of rage, then hear the lecture of how I should keep myself in check.

Okay I have to go dry my face off and put on a smile so I can go pick kids up from school. I'll be back in a bit.

Thanksgiving

2005-11-24T14:20:00.000-05:00

Ugh is all I can say. As usual it was filled with drama. I woke up in a foul mood, and nothing was going right. Poor Terry could just look across at me and I would launch into a tirade. This must be part of my bipolar tendencies. I took my shower and went to fix my hair, but my brand new can of mousse was empty, off to Walgreen's to get another. Come home start again on my hair, no hairspray, I'm sure by this time you can see the steam pouring out of my ears. Anyways, just said screw it and grabbed a clip to get it the hell out of my face. Never got a chance to get any make up on, but who cares. So we finally get everyone loaded up into the hoopty van and head over to my parents house. Drama had already started over there too with my aunt the alcoholic being her spiteful self. She can be just downright nasty to people when she's off the wagon. Terry slept the entire time we were there, which made it fun for me. I was afraid to step out in the garage to smoke for fear one of the kids would do something. Eventually I got Terry to wake up enough to help me get the kids together and come home, then I went to bed.

That was our Thanksgiving in a nut shell. Can't wait until next year!!

Twenty One Rules

2005-11-20T17:36:00.000-05:00

I got this in an email from my dad and really liked it. I thought I would share it with you all too...

TWENTY-ONE RULES TO LIVE BY

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversation skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don’t believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, “I love you,” mean it.

FIVE. When you say, “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone’s dream. People who don’t have dreams don’t have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it’s the only way to live life completely.

TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don’t judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don’t want to answer, smile and ask, “Why do you want to know?”

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say “God bless you” when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R’s: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.

SPF Friday

2005-11-18T15:40:00.000-05:00

Something that represents your past

This box of pictures represents everything from my past, a garbled mess. I once went through them and organized them to the best of my abilities, but someone knocked them over and this was the outcome. There are many generations in this box, many I'll never know about. Also what's left of my childhood, my life with my Mammaw and Pappaw. The truth behind my tears.

Something that represents my present

Chaos. Need I say more.

Something that represents my future

I have a long road to travel. Some days it seems it's going no where, others it seems as if it's going to fast. Hopefully someday I can find where I'm supposed to be.

I woke up in a funk today, as if it isn't obvious. But the above pictures, they are me. They are where I came from, where I am and where I am going.

Chicagoween 2

2005-11-17T10:11:00.000-05:00

Check out this super cool movie that a great friend of mine put together. He is so very talented. Every year in the after math of the Halloween party Axel puts together a movie. This years is even better than last years and last years is great. So click the link and sit back and enjoy. Also if you like hard music turn up the volume, if you're at work or don't like the music, turn the volume down. You have been warned...

Chicagoween 2

PS. Anyone ever give a goose job?